


Let's Start at the Very Beginning

by That_Would_Be_Enough



Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Anal Sex, Blindfolds, Blow Jobs, College, Fluff, Gags, Light BDSM, M/M, Oral Sex, Rough Sex, Smut
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-02-13
Updated: 2017-10-04
Packaged: 2018-09-24 04:41:51
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 18
Words: 37,749
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9702665
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/That_Would_Be_Enough/pseuds/That_Would_Be_Enough
Summary: Inspired by one_golden_sun's universe.Alex is an RA at Columbia. During the first week of school his sleep is interrupted by a freshman on his floor, Lafayette.By the end of the night he's stuck wondering just how much trouble he'd be in for dating one of his residents.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [one_golden_sun](https://archiveofourown.org/users/one_golden_sun/gifts).



Alex woke suddenly, rubbing at his eyes and sitting up slowly. He blinked a few times, trying to get the world into focus, when he once again heard three loud knocks on his door. He glanced at his phone, plugged in on his night stand. It was two in the morning. He groaned quietly, stretching out and standing up slowly. Just as he was heading towards the door, the person on the other side knocked again.

“I’m coming, I’m coming.” Being an RA had its perks, but being awoken by residents in the middle of the night was not one of them. 

He pulled open the door to reveal one of the freshman on his floor. The one from France, his brain supplied. He was tall and handsome, and Alex became somewhat self-conscious of his messy, disheveled appearance. 

The other student stood there for a moment, hesitant. Alex sighed, wondering what he needed at two in the morning, and prompted him. “Yes? You need something?”

“It’s my roommate. He came back recently. He’s…” he paused, trying to think of the correct word, “sick? I think he might need help.”

“He go out drinking?” Perhaps he shouldn’t assume, but it was the middle of the night during the first week of class. A lot of freshman spent the beginning of the semester realizing that they didn’t know their limits. 

“I’m not sure. Probably?”

“Alright. Let me just grab my phone.” He walked back towards the nightstand and pulled the phone free from its charger. Realizing he was in only his sweatpants, he grabbed a shirt off of his chair and yanked it on over his head as he walked back towards the freshman. As he followed him to his room, he glanced at his door, reading the two names. Lafayette. He stored the name away in his head for later. 

Lafayette opened the door, and Alex cursed at the scene playing out. The other kid, Thomas, was laying on his back on the bed. The floor was a mess, covered in the kid’s vomit. He was awake, groaning and mumbling to himself. “Fucking Christ.” He walked over to the bed, avoiding the mess, and leaned over Thomas. “Come on now, you’ve got to get on your side. Come on.” The kid either wasn’t listening to him or couldn’t hear him. He grabbed his shoulder and started pushing him over, eventually getting him onto his side. “Hey, Lafayette?” The other freshman looked over at the sound of his name. “Can you stand here for a minute and just make sure he stays like this? Don’t need him choking on his own puke.” 

“Sure.” Lafayette did as he was asked, standing at the head of the bed. 

Alex began mumbling as he pulled out his phone. “Can’t believe this. I have an 8 am class, but this kid can’t keep his goddamn liquor down. Fucking inconsiderate brat.”

“Don’t you think that will just make him feel worse?” Lafayette asked, glancing down at his roommate. 

“He’s pretty far gone. Doubt he can even comprehend what I’m saying. If he can, he won’t remember it tomorrow anyway. Sorry if being woken up at two in the morning doesn’t put me in the best mood.” He let the sarcasm drip from his voice, too tired to care as much as he probably should. He finally got the right contact pulled up on his phone and hit the call button, waiting as it rang. 

“Hello? Campus emergency? Name is Alexander Hamilton. I have a student here who probably has alcohol poisoning.” He answered a few more questions for them, remembering from his training all of the information he should give. He thanked them, trying to be as polite as he could even though he was irritated, and hung up. 

“They’ll have an ambulance here for him in a few minutes.”

“Is that necessary?” Lafayette looked at his roommate again, eyeing the now quiet boy with pity. 

“More of a precaution than anything. If we don’t call for one and anything happens the university could be in legal trouble, and therefore I would be in trouble. He’s not here on scholarship, so I’m assuming his parents can pay for the ambulance,” he said, a hint of bitterness in his voice. 

Lafayette made a small noise of agreement. He seemed uncomfortable. 

Alex sighed. He wanted to get back to sleep, but Lafayette seemed anxious. “You okay?”

“I’m fine. Just didn’t know how to help him. He seemed alright one minute, but drunk, then he just started throwing up. He was saying not to go for help. Saying he was fine, but he did not seem fine.”

“Look, you did the right thing. Sorry if I’m a little irritated. Ignore that okay? I’m supposed to help when something like this happens. I just get grumpy when I’m tired. And as far as what he told you? You would have felt much worse if you didn’t get help and something happened to him. Okay?”

Lafayette fell silent, staring at his feet. Alex felt a twinge of guilt for letting his annoyance at being woken up make one of his residents feel bad. 

At that moment, he heard noise in the hallway. He pulled the door open, motioning the EMTs into the room. Alex and Lafayette both stepped to the far side of the room, giving the EMTs space to work. They watched as Lafayette’s roommate was lifted from the bed and set on a stretcher. He was still awake, moaning with discomfort as they moved him. One of the EMTs came over to the two of them and looked back and forth between them. “Um, which one of you is Alexander?” 

“That’s me.”

“Right, we just need some information. Also, is anyone going to the hospital with him?”

Alex eyed the guy in the stretcher for a minute. He seemed like he would be alright, and considering he had been asking his roommate not to get help, he probably wouldn’t be too pleased with Alex for calling the ambulance. “No, he can go by himself. He should have my number if he needs anything later. I gave it to all of them on the first day.” After a few standard questions, they were on their way down the elevator. 

Alex glanced at Lafayette, now sitting on the edge of his bed. He seemed a little shaken up, still tense from the whole situation. He chewed the inside of his cheek as he considered. It was still syllabus week. If he skipped his early class tomorrow he probably wouldn’t miss anything important. He’d just email the professor explaining the situation. He never understood why they had to read the syllabus out loud to the class anyway. 

He made his way to the bed and sat down next to Lafayette. “You want me to stay for a little bit?”

He glanced up, surprised. “You don’t have to do that. You have an early class, no?”

“It’s fine. I’m skipping it.” Lafayette looked skeptical, so he went on, “Seriously. I’ve already decided I’m skipping so it’s not like you’re making me miss class. I’m awake now anyway, and you don’t seem like you’re sleeping very soon, so we might as well be awake together.”

Lafayette gave in, nodded his head as he stared down at the ground. “You’re right. I’m not tired. Even without that… interruption. My sleep is all thrown off. I just arrived from France before the semester started.”

“Ah. Jetlag’s a bitch. So you’re from France. What’s that like?”

“It’s a nice place. A little different, a little the same. Better food.”

Alex smirked at that. “You just haven’t been to the right places. We’re in New York City. There’s plenty of amazing food, you’ve just got to know where to find it.”

“I suppose.” Silence settled over them again. 

Alex glanced around the room, and he suddenly became very aware that they never cleaned up the mess Lafayette’s roommate had made. “Um. Do you have any cleaning supplies? That smells pretty bad and you probably don’t want to just leave it there,” he said motioning towards the pile of sick with his head. 

“I have some paper towels and disinfectant spray. Let me get them.” Alex watched as Lafayette got up and pulled a storage bin out from under his bed, grabbing supplies and placing them on the floor next to him. He ripped a few sheets off of the paper towel roll and set to cleaning the floor. Alex grabbed a few sheets as well and joined him. He scrunched his face in distaste as he crouched down.

“That smells awful. It should be him cleaning up this shit, not you.”

“Yes. That would be difficult though, seeing how he is in a hospital bed somewhere.”

They finished cleaning, spraying a liberal amount of the disinfectant and a bit of Febreze for good measure. Satisfied with their work they returned to Lafayette’s bed. Alex leaned back against the wall, his leg stretched across the width of the mattress. 

“So, you were saying you know where the good restaurants are?” 

“Plenty.” Alex couldn’t help the yawn that escaped his mouth. “All different kinds of food. Most of it’s really good too.”

“Perhaps you can show me sometime then?” Lafayette’s voice was quiet. Alex thought he may even sound a little nervous. 

“Sure thing. There’s a few places that are actually pretty close. Thai, Ethiopian, Italian, Caribbean... I’m sure we can find something you’ll like.” His eyes drifted shut. It felt so good to rest them. 

“Alex?”

“Mhmm?” He kept his eyes closed, listening to the sound of Lafayette’s voice.

“Thank you for helping with everything tonight. I’m normally better at handling things than this, and I just- I really appreciate it.”

“No problem.” He slumped a bit to the side and felt his head land on Lafayette’s shoulder. He heard him chuckle beside him, but he was too tired to pick his head back up.

 

Alex woke the next morning alone in Lafayette’s bed with a blanket over him and a pillow under his head. He blinked a few times, adjusting to the sunlight streaming in through the window. He rolled over and noticed a note on the desk next to the bed. 

Went to class. Didn’t want to wake you. Thank you again for last night.  
-Lafayette

He picked up the note and stared at the delicate handwriting for several minutes before folding it up and putting it in his sweatpants pocket. As he walked back to his room he found himself unsure what to do with the realization that he had a crush on one of his residents.


	2. Chapter 2

Alex had the distinct feeling that Lafayette was following him. Most of the students on his floor only came to his door when they were having a problem with something, but after that first night Lafayette showed up at least once a day just to talk and hang out in Alex’s room. When he realized this was becoming a trend, Alex made more of an effort to keep his room a little tidier. He enjoyed the company, though he did have to remind Lafayette that he had to study and do his school work occasionally. 

It was a Thursday morning, dark and rainy outside. He was filling in for someone else at the front desk. He had his laptop open next to him, working on an assignment comparing the political systems of ancient Greece and Rome to those of today. He occasionally looked up as students walked in the building, dressed in raincoats and boots and trailing water behind them as they headed for the elevator. He was trying to figure out how to smoothly transition into his next paragraph when he heard a familiar voice on the other side of the desk. 

“Alex! Mon ami!”

Alex pulled his face away from the screen. Lafayette was standing in front of him, drenched from the rain outside. His grey t-shirt clung to his torso, hugging the muscles underneath, and he was wearing a pair of tight black pants, a rubber mat slung over his shoulder. His hair was frizzy with the humidity, and little water droplets still clung to his curls. 

Alex’s voice caught in his throat for a moment as he stared at him. He coughed, clearing his throat, and eyed his attire. “And where are you coming from?”

“My yoga class.”

He raised his eyebrows in surprise. “You’re taking a yoga class?” 

“Oui. My advisor recommended one… what’s the word? Non-studious class?”

“A bullshit class. Or an easy A class. Either of those work. Seriously though, yoga?”

“It’s good for flexibility. We also have discussions about the yamas and niyamas and how they relate to our lives.”

“Yep. Sounds like a bullshit class.”

“Say what you want. I think it’s nice. Meditation might actually be good for you. Help with your attitude problem.”

Alex snorted. “Excuse you. I do not have an attitude problem. And if I did, sitting quietly while contemplating my place in the world would not fix it.” 

Lafayette smirked, but simply shrugged, not in the mood to argue. He leaned forward, resting his elbows on the desk, droplets of water dripping on the wood. “So, when are you going to show me where the good food is?” 

“Oh. I had kind of forgot about that. The week’s almost over, how about tomorrow night?”

Lafayette smiled at him, perfect white teeth and full lips sending butterflies to Alex’s stomach. “Tomorrow is perfect. You’re done with class when? Four?” 

“Yeah. Around then. Want to meet up at like, five?”

“Sure.” He straightened up again, pushing some wet curls away from his face. “Now, if you’ll excuse me, I really have to change out of these wet clothes before my next class.” Alex couldn’t help but stare as  
he walked towards the stairs in what appeared to be yoga pants.

 

Alex got out of his last class on Friday ten minutes late. He had watched the clock tick as the professor droned on, assuring them that he was nearly finished. If he hadn’t been sitting in the middle of his row, he would have gotten up and left. He walked quickly across campus, just missing a shuttle bus as he left the lecture hall. As he approached the elevators in his dorm building, he heard a voice call his name. He  
took a deep breath and turned around. “Yes, Evan?” His residence director stood several yards away. 

“Do you have a minute? I wanted to talk to you about something.”

Alex considered telling him, no, he did not have a minute. However, the RA job did pay for his room and meal plan. “Yeah? What is it?” 

“There have been some reports of- well- people have been…” 

Alex pursed his lips, impatience growing. “Yes? People have been what?”

“Um, it appears in some of the dorms people have been having sex in the laundry rooms.”

Alex couldn’t help the short breath of laughter of that escaped him. 

“Yes. Well, we can’t really have that happening in public areas, so we want all of the RAs to have a floor meeting. Just tell the residents that it won’t be tolerated and that if they’re caught they could be fined  
or put on probation.” 

“Alright,” he bit his lip, holding back more laughter. “Tell the students not to do it on the washers. Got it.”

“So you’ll have the floor meeting tonight?”

“Tonight? It’s Friday night, no one’s even going to show up.”

“Order a pizza or something. That usually gets a few people at last.”

“Evan. I have plans tonight.”

“It needs to be tonight. All the other RAs are doing it tonight. I can’t make exceptions.”

Alex made a noise of annoyance, wishing he had made it to the elevators faster. “Fine. They’re not getting pizza though. I couldn’t care less if they show up or not.” He walked away before Evan could respond, very aware that he was not winning any points with his boss. He pulled out his phone to check the time. Quarter to five. As he got off of the elevator he headed for Lafayette’s room first. 

Lafayette opened the door wearing dark wash jeans and a tight undershirt. Alex couldn’t help but sneak a look at the biceps peeking out from his sleeves. “Alex! You’re a little early. I’ll be ready in just a few minutes.”

“Actually. Change of plans. I have to a have a floor meeting. You can come if you want. Well actually, you’re supposed to come. You live on the floor. Where’s Thomas?”

“He left a little while ago to see some concert or something. It’s Friday night. Do you really need to have a meeting?”

“That’s what I said. But apparently I do. It’s a very serious matter.”

“Oh? What happened?”

“You have to wait for the meeting to hear about that. Just put on your shirt or whatever else you have to do and meet me in the hall, okay?” 

He spent the next few minutes knocking on doors and gathering the few students who were actually in their rooms. Once they were all gathered on the floor he passed a clipboard around for the students to sign in. Lafayette was the last one to join them, plopping down next to Alex against the wall. “Anyone have anything important to discuss before we get started?” He didn’t give anyone time to talk before he continued. “No? Okay good.” 

One of the students chirped in. “Wait I have a question.”

Alex clenched his jaw. “Yes?”

“When are the two broken driers going to be fixed?”

“If you had gone to our first floor meeting the first week of class you would know how to submit a request to have them fixed.” The kid stared at him, unsure how to answer. Alex sighed. “I’ll put in the request. Anyway, the reason we’re here is actually related to the laundry room. Can anyone tell me where the acceptable locations to have sex in the dorm buildings are?”

The students looked back him in silence. He waited for about 30 seconds before one of them spoke up. “Is this a trick question?”

“No. The answer is in your rooms. Or someone else’s room. The answer is not in the laundry room. Got it?”

They all nodded their heads. 

“Since some people don’t seem to understand that, they’re making me have this meeting to tell you all. Don’t have sex in the laundry room. For good measure, don’t have sex in the lobby or the lounge  
either. If any of you are caught having sex outside the privacy of a dorm room, they’re going to fine you or put you on probation or punish you in some other sort of way. Everyone understand?”

They all muttered responses in agreement. 

“Alright. Good talk. Go back to whatever it is you were doing.” He turned to face Lafayette. “Sorry about that. I still have to change and grab my wallet and stuff.”

“It’s fine, Alex. It’s only quarter after five.” Lafayette pulled himself up to his feet and reached down to help Alex up as well. Once they got inside the room, Alex pulled a pair of jeans and a sweater from his  
dresser and began pulling off his comfy clothes that he wore to class. Lafayette, who was sitting on the bed, turned around to give him privacy. Once he was fully clothed with his wallet and keys tucked into his pocket, the two of them headed down the hall. When they reached the landing Lafayette turned towards the stairs. 

“What are you doing? There’s elevators.” 

“It’s healthier to take the stairs.”

“But we’re high up.”

“It’s only five floors. It’s not that far.”

“I have smaller legs than you.”

“It’s the same amount of stairs no matter how long your legs are.”

Alex grumbled, but followed him to the stairs. “This is dumb you know. It’s a waste of time and energy.”

Lafayette smiled and shrugged as he nearly bounced down the stairs. 

“How do you have so much energy? That shouldn’t be allowed at the end of the week. Or the beginning of the week for that matter.”

“I don’t overload myself with work and waste all of my energy stressing over my responsibilities.”

“I have to have all of those responsibilities. Not everyone has rich parents to pay for things.”

“I actually don’t have parents. They died. I do have money though, so I guess your point still stands.”

Alex fell silent, feeling guilty about his assumption. He awkwardly looked at the ground, trying to think of something to say. 

Lafayette saved him he the trouble, starting up again. “Anyway, you may have to get good grades and do the RA thing, but you didn’t have to take eighteen credits and join the student council. That’s more of what I was referring to.”

“Oh. Yeah I guess.” He paused for a minute as they reached the bottom of the staircase and headed outside. “Sorry by the way. About your parents. Mine died too. Well my mom at least. My dad might have. Who knows.” 

Lafayette looked down, giving him a sympathetic smile. “Don’t be sorry. It happened long ago. Let’s not worry about that now.”

“Yeah. So what kind of food are you in the mood for?”

“French?”

“That’s cheating. Come on, you have to try new things.”

“Fine. Surprise me. I trust your taste.”

Alex grinned and began leading him to his favorite Indian restaurant.


	3. Chapter 3

Alex was up earlier than normal for a Saturday. It was a busy week with two tests and a paper due, and he had to finish his article for the current events section of the school newspaper. He had intended to get an early start on his work and was fifteen minutes into studying for a political theory test when he heard a knock at his door. He took one last sip of his coffee before answering it. 

Lafayette stood there, a laptop and a few sheets of paper tucked under his arm. Alex had never seen him wear glasses before, and he had to admit, he actually pulled them off quite well. “What’s up? It’s still morning.”

“Sorry. I was just wondering if you could help me with something.” He walked past Alex into his room without waiting for an invitation. He pushed the papers in his hand towards Alex who reluctantly accepted them. “It’s this writing class I am taking. I have been speaking English for years and years now, but the professor keeps telling me my grammar is wrong. It’s stupid things. Commas in the wrong places, ending sentences with the wrong words. I was wondering if you could look it over for me and give me advice.” 

Alex glanced back at his own textbook, still lying open on his desk. “Sure,” he said slowly. “I can do that.” Lafayette stared at him expectantly as he stared at the first page. “Can you not stare at me though? It’s weird. If you’re going to make me read this just sit on the bed and keep yourself busy for a few minutes.” Alex settled back in at his desk, pushing his textbook aside. After reading the first paragraph he grabbed a pen to make some notes. Ten minutes later he handed back a highly marked up copy of Lafayette’s paper. 

“What is all this?”

“Some of it’s grammar. Some of it’s just things that I thought would sound better phrased differently, and some of it’s ideas that I thought would strengthen your point.”

“Oh. Alright. Do you mind if I work on the corrections in here? My roommate’s still asleep.”

“Sure. I only have one desk though.”

“I can work on the bed.”

They sat in relative silence for about half an hour, Lafayette fixing his paper and Alex studying. Eventually, Lafayette broke the silence. “Alex?”

“Yes?” 

“Have you ever seen Star Wars?”

“Of course I’ve seen Star Wars.”

“Oh.”

There was more silence until Alex’s curiosity got the better of him. “Does that mean you haven’t seen Star Wars?”

“I never got around to it.” He shrugged. “I’ve heard so many things about it though, especially with the last one coming out a couple of years ago. I heard some people in my class talking about it the other day, and it reminded me that I never watched them.”

“You really should. They’re incredible. Well, the older ones more than the newer ones.”

“We should do that later then.”

“Watch Star Wars?”

Lafayette nodded, smiling. 

“How are we supposed to do that? We don’t have anything to watch them on.”

“I have a television. And a DVD player.”

“I didn’t see one in your room.”

“You haven’t been there in a little while. I bought it about a week ago. I thought it might come in handy. You do have the movies right? I thought I saw them in here one time.”

“Yeah. I do. I can’t believe you went and bought a TV, but I guess we can watch them later. You want to marathon them? Watch them all in one sitting?”

“That would be wonderful.” Lafayette smiled brightly at him, and Alex couldn’t help but smile back. 

 

Around four that evening, Lafayette arrived at Alex’s room, struggling to carry a large TV with him. He made a second trip to get his DVD player, and soon the two of them were sitting on the bed, leaning against the wall, with the TV perched on Alex’s desk across from them. 

“You ready?” Alex asked, leaning up slightly to look at his friend. 

“Ready,” Lafayette responded, picking up the remote to start the movie. 

They both stared at the screen as the words started to scroll down. 

“What is all this?”

“Shhh. Just read.” 

 

Half an hour into the first movie Alex got up to make popcorn. When he brought the bag over to the bed and sat back down, Lafayette scooched just a little bit closer. Alex suddenly felt like the room was very warm, but he wasn’t entirely sure if it was from Lafayette’s body heat or just the thought of how close they were. Alex took a moment to really look at him while he was focused on the movie. He was in a pair of sweats and a t-shirt, his pecs and biceps clearly visible even with the fabric in the way. His hair was pulled up in a neat bun, offering an unobstructed view of his face and jawline. His eyes were focused, staring at the hologram of Princess Leia as she told Luke and Obi-Wan Kenobi about the information encoded in R2-D2. He looked relaxed, happy, and absolutely perfect. Alex wanted to reach out and touch him, run his hands over his arms, his abs. Instead he turned to face the screen again and leaned into him, their shoulders touching as they snacked on the popcorn. 

As they watched their way through the movies, the two of them grew tired. Part way through the fifth movie Lafayette had started to fall asleep. Alex felt his body weight sag against him, and he began to shake him awake. “Hey, Lafayette?” He jumped a bit as he woke up. 

“Yeah?” he mumbled. 

“You want to pause the movie? We can finish later.”

“No. It’s a marathon. No pausing. We must finish all of them.”

Alex chuckled, eyeing his slumped over posture. “You want some soda or coffee or something? We’ve still got about three hours left.”

“Coffee would be nice. Thank you.”

“Don’t mention it.” As Alex stood up, he noticed Lafayette slump back against the wall. “Sit up or you’re going to fall asleep again before the coffee’s done.”

As Alex waited for the coffee to brew, Lafayette sat up straighter on the bed and stretched out. “Alex? Can we go get brunch in the morning?”

“It is the morning,” Alex pointed out. 

“Later in the morning.”

“We just got dinner the other night. I can’t afford to go out to eat every other day, you know.”

“I’ll pay for you. Please, Alex? I want to try more restaurants.”

“Fine. You’re going to be tired though. If we’re getting up for brunch you’re only going to be getting like five hours of sleep.”

“You can just make me more coffee.” 

They made it through the rest of the movies and fell asleep next to each other around five in the morning, Lafayette too tired to go back to his own room. Alex slept comfortably that night, the heat from Lafayette’s body keeping him warmer than usual. When he woke up later that morning, Lafayette’s arm was draped over him. Alex could hear his breathing, slow and deep. He squirmed his way out from underneath him as quietly as he could and got up from the bed. He glanced at the time on his phone and then stripped out of his clothing from the night before, wrapping a towel around his waist. He closed the door behind him as quietly as he could and headed for the bathroom. 

The dorm showers were temperamental, so once he got the water to a temperature that was neither freezing nor scalding, he stepped under the stream. As he lathered the soap over his body his mind drifted back to the boy in his bed, with his strong arms, dark eyes, and perfect lips. He wished he was in the shower with him so he could see the rest of his body. His hand drifted down to his cock and he stroked himself slowly as he thought about Lafayette, wet and naked. He sped up his hand, thinking about him in the shower with him, dropping down to his knees in front of him to suck his cock. It only took a few minutes of fantasizing before he was finishing, cum pulsing out onto his hand and the floor of the shower stall. He took a few minutes to compose himself, then finished cleaning his body and hair before stepping out of the shower and wrapping the towel around his waist again. 

When he got back to his room, Lafayette was awake, attempting to figure out how Alex’s coffee pot worked. He looked up as the door opened, greeting him with a “good morning” and Alex felt very vulnerable in nothing but his towel. “Sorry, had to shower.”

“I figured that out.” Lafayette glanced at him, taking in his dripping wet hair and lack of clothes, and the look he gave him was hard to read. His discomfort increased. 

“Yeah, right. Well I’m just going to change real quick, and then I’m ready whenever you are.”

“After you make us coffee?”

“Yes, after I make us coffee. Now turn around.”

Alex changed into a fresh outfit quickly, feeling much better now that he was fully clothed again. “You’ve never made coffee by yourself, have you?”

Lafayette shook his head, looking embarrassed. “I’d always just go out and buy it if I wanted some.”

“Well, here. Let me show you how to do it so you can if you need to.” Lafayette watched as he replaced the filter and poured some of the ground coffee in, double checking the water level before flipping the switch to start the machine. “See? Easier than walking out of the building to buy coffee.”

When the machine stopped dripping, he poured out a cup for each of them. Lafayette added some sugar to his and the two of them sipped in silence. Once both their cups were drained, Lafayette got up, stretching his body out and placing the empty mug back on the desk. “I have to shower still. I’ll meet you back here in a little bit.”

“Okay, hurry up though. It’s brunch in the city on a Sunday, and I don’t want to wait all day for a table.”

Lafayette laughed, and Alex loved the way the corners of his eyes crinkled. “Alright, alright. I’ll hurry. Has anyone ever told you you’re very impatient?”

“Once or twice.” Alex watched as he left, his broad shoulders on display, and he thought back to his shower. He thought about him naked and dripping, with the steam from the hot water surrounding him. His dick stiffened as his mind replayed those thoughts. He was lucky that Lafayette’s back was turned, and he couldn’t see the fierce blush on his cheeks.


	4. Chapter 4

They arrived at brunch a short while later, a small place off a side street with pancakes, waffles, french toast, and all the typical breakfast staples. It was crowded and filled with the noise of chatter, but it wasn’t too long before they were seated at a small table in the corner. Alex watched as Lafayette took in their surroundings, staring at the art on the walls and the potted plants that hung from the ceiling. “This is nice. It’s cute.”

“It kind of has a hipster vibe, but the food is great.” Most of the other people in the restaurant were college students too. A group of girls talked loudly at the table next to them, discussing some party from the night before. 

They were both grateful when the waiter came over with coffee, still tired from the night’s activities. As they sipped, Alex asked, “So, how’d you like Star Wars? You were a little too tired at the end to give me your thoughts.”

“It was good. Really good. The special effects were a little cheesy, but overall it was great.”

“The old school special effects are part of the charm,” Alex emphasized, leaning forward in his chair. “What about Luke and Leia being twins? Were you surprised? That was a huge plot twist when the movie came out.”

“I had already heard about it from somewhere,” Lafayette admitted. “So no, not really surprised.” 

“Aw man. Oh well.” He glanced down at his menu, contemplating. “You decide what you’re getting yet?”

“I was thinking the pancakes with strawberries.”

“Those are good. I think I’m going to go with waffles. They’re huge.”

Lafayette nodded, closing his menu. “Last night was fun.”

“Yeah? We didn’t do much.”

He shrugged. “Still. I like spending time with you.”

Alex smiled at that. “Hey, I’m going to a party next weekend.” He was saying it without really thinking about it. “Want to come with me? You can meet some of my friends, expand your social circle in the city a bit.”

“Sure! Where is it?”

“An apartment in the lower west side. It should be fun. I know I’m going to be ready to unwind at the end of this fucking long week.”

Lafayette laughed a bit. “Sounds good to me.” Their waiter came over then, interrupting them. As they placed their orders, Alex realized that he probably shouldn’t be inviting one of his residents to a party. Oh well, he thought, as he glanced back at Lafayette, handsome and charming as he placed his order. 

They chatted through brunch, talking about classes and any stories that may have come up. Lafayette seemed pleased with his pancakes, groaning with delight at the first bite. As they finished up and waited for the check, Lafayette leaned across the table, brushing his fingers against the corner of Alex’s lips. 

“What-“

“You had a little bit of syrup there,” Lafayette offered as explanation, holding out his fingers with the evidence. 

“Oh.” Alex felt the slight blush in his cheeks and hoped it wasn’t too noticeable. “Thanks.”

Lafayette paid, and they walked out into the city. It was brisk outside, and Alex pulled his jacket close to himself. As they walked, Alex was lost in his thoughts. His mind drifted back to that morning. Waking up with Lafayette in his bed, thinking about him in the shower. He was beginning to regret inviting him to the party, not because he didn’t want him there, but because it was making him extremely anxious. He didn’t know how his friends would react, or whether Lafayette would even like them. They could be a little overwhelming at times. Too late now, he told himself. 

When they got close to their building, Lafayette asked, “So, any plans for the rest of the day?”

“I really have to work on some stuff. I have a paper due tomorrow and a test on Tuesday. Aren’t you sick of me yet?”

Lafayette laughed. “I’m not sick of you, but I’ll let you get some work done. Besides, I should really do some of my own.”

As they reached their floor, Alex turned to Lafayette who was pulling his own door open. “Bother me again in a couple of days though, okay? I have a busy week, but I think I’ll miss you if you’re gone too long. You’re growing on me.”

 

Alex spent the rest of the week focusing on his work. After his exam on Tuesday, he expected Lafayette to show up at his door again bugging him to hangout, and he found himself disappointed when the only knock that night was some kid having roommate troubles. Wednesday and Thursday found Alex particularly productive, churning out two papers, getting all of his studying done for his exam on Friday, and getting ahead on his reading, however he still found himself missing his new friend. It was a strange, unexpected feeling of emptiness, and he found himself restless. On Friday, after leaving his exam with a good feeling, he made his way back to his building, pausing outside Lafayette’s door. He knocked a few times. Waited. Knocked a couple more times. “Lafayette? You in there?” No answer. 

He sighed, heading back to his own room. He pulled out his phone, sending off a text message. 

“Hey. Where are you? Wanted to know if you still wanna come with me this weekend?”

It was about forty-five minutes before he got a response. 

“Sorry. At the gym. Be back soon. Definitely still interested.”

A little while later he heard a knock at his door and opened it to reveal Lafayette. “Long time, no see.”

He cocked his head to the side a little bit, his forehead creasing with confusion. “Mon ami, you sound upset.”

“You stopped showing up to hang out with me,” he responded, an accusatory tone in his voice.

“I knew you were busy this week. I wanted to give you space so you could focus, so I went down to check out the fitness center on Monday. I joined an intramural dodgeball team.”

Alex bit his lip, an involuntary smile pulling at the corners of his mouth. “Intramural dodgeball? Really?”

“Yes, really. And I made some friends there, so I was keeping busy with them so I wouldn’t bother you so much.”

“You don’t bother me.” His voice was quiet, small. 

Lafayette’s eyebrows raised in surprise. “Really? I’m pretty sure I showed up at your room every day last week. It’s alright if I’m bothering you. You don’t have to lie to me.”

“I mean-” Alex paused, trying to phrase his thoughts correctly. “I guess you were bothering me a little, but I didn’t mind. I liked having you around. I told you that.”

“Alright,” Lafayette said slowly, unsure. “I just didn’t want you to get tired of me, and I didn’t want to distract you from your work. I know you have a lot on your plate.”

Alex felt relieved. He had kept himself so busy over the last week that he barely realized how worried he had been. He thought that he must have done something wrong, something to drive off Lafayette. He felt like he could finally breathe properly. “I’ve learned to multi-task. Look, I’ll let you know if you’re annoying me. Promise. Just don’t avoid me because you think that’s what I want. Okay?”

“Okay, Alex.” He nodded in understanding. “I won’t. You really missed me a lot, didn’t you?” He gave him a teasing grin. 

“I’m not answering that.” He smiled back, allowing himself to relax.

 

That night Alex found himself dreaming of Lafayette. His daydreams of him were generally sexual fantasies, but this was different. He dreamt about the two of them holding hands, snuggling on the couch together, shopping and cooking together. It was incredibly domestic, and his dream-self was unusually happy. He was more relaxed and comfortable than he had felt in years. His insides warm, like they were wrapped up in a soft, cozy blanket. 

When he woke up in the morning, his happiness changed to confusion. “What the hell,” he mumbled to himself, rolling over and burying his face in his pillow, blocking out the light from outside and trying to push any feelings the dream may have stirred up back down, deep inside of him. He was young, still in college. He didn’t do mushy, gooey relationships like that. When he dated, it wasn’t to find a lifelong partner, it was to have fun with someone for a while. He was looking for someone to fool around with, not for someone to move in with. 

He got out of bed slowly, stretching and cracking his back. He yanked on some clothes, jeans and a sweatshirt, and headed out into the city, intent on clearing his head with a walk. He ended up in Central Park, wandering down the paths with countless other people. As busy as it was, he liked coming to Central Park when he needed to think. The pathways were familiar and comfortable to him, and the amount of people gave him a feeling of anonymity. He could blend in and process his own thoughts without feeling like people were watching him. He eventually got tired, his feet feeling sore, and plopped down under a large tree. He leaned against the trunk, closing his eyes and letting the unseasonal warmth from the sun wash over him. As he sat there, he came to the conclusion that his dream was the result of his crush on Lafayette, nothing more than that. If he could get past it, he wouldn’t have those feelings again. He would have to make a move, see if Lafayette was interested in him too. If he was, and they hooked up, he would be able to get it out of his system. He wouldn’t have to deal with the obsessive, butterfly-inducing feelings of attraction controlling his thoughts anymore. And if he wasn’t? Well, then he’d have a whole other reason to no longer feel so infatuated. 

The party, he decided, was a great opportunity to bring it up. He figured a good amount of alcohol would help with the conversation, loosen up their inhibitions a bit and allow the words that were currently stuck inside to flow out. After a short while of planning out the night in his head, he pushed himself up from his spot on the ground and headed back to his building, nervous but determined to figure out how Lafayette felt that night.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the wait on this one. I had a job interview that I had to focus on, but I think it went well!

Alex arrived at Hercules’ apartment a little past eight. The party wouldn’t really get started until after nine, but he wanted to talk with his friend a bit before everyone else got there and figured he could use the help setting up anyway. He had already pushed furniture out of the way in his living room to provide ample space for mingling and dancing. They were currently in his kitchen, pouring snack food into bowls and filling tubs with ice for drinks. 

As they walked to the living room to place the bowls on the coffee table, Alex glanced over at his friend. “You’re sure you don’t mind that I invited someone?” 

Herc snorted. “When have I ever minded? You know my parties are always open to friends. Plus, I’m always excited to meet whoever it is you’re dating.”

“Not dating.”

Herc gave him an infuriating smirk. “Okay, not dating. You want to though, right? I’ve heard the way you talk about him. Sounds like you have it pretty bad for this guy.”

Alex made a frustrated noise. “Can you make me a drink if we’re going to talk about this? I’m wound up enough as is after the week I’ve had, and discussing my feelings for a guy isn’t helping me relax any.”

Herc rolled his eyes, but walked over to his stash of booze. “Rum okay? I have a lot of rum.”

“Yeah, whatever is fine. Just make it strong.” 

“So,” he said after handing over a brightly colored drink. “You like him right?”

“Yes.” Alex took a sip, involuntarily scrunching his face at the sting of the rum. “He’s gorgeous. I don’t understand how anybody could not like him. He’s tall and strong, and the way he smiles? He’s fucking beautiful. And he’s so nice too. He’s one of the most genuinely nice people I’ve ever met.”

“Yeah, definitely sounds like you have it bad for him,” Herc laughed, but gave him an affectionate pat on the back. “So if you’re not dating, what then?”

“We’re just friends. I want to-” Alex struggled, unsure. “Well I want to be more than that I guess.”

“You guess?” Herc raised his eyebrows. 

“I don’t know. I don’t even know if he’s interested, and I don’t want to get into anything too serious.”

“Take it one step at a time. You like him?” Alex nodded. “Then go for it. It doesn’t need to be something serious. If you want that eventually, maybe it’ll turn into that, but if not that’s alright too. Just take it easy for now.”

“And if he’s not interested, and I just make a fool of myself?”

“You’re clearly crushing on him hard. You’ve got to just go for it.”

“Easier said than done,” Alex grumbled, downing the rest of his drink quickly. 

 

When he first spotted Lafayette, Alex was sufficiently buzzed. He made his way across the room, smiling at him as he handed a pack of beer to Hercules. “Laf! You made it!” He leaned forward a bit, gripping him in a quick hug. “You didn’t have to bring anything.”

Hercules shot him a look. “I appreciate it. You obviously never have to bring anything, but it’s good to know that you’re more generous than Alex. Maybe you’ll rub off on him a bit.” 

Lafayette laughed, giving Alex a reassuring squeeze on his shoulder. “I was just happy to be invited. Your place looks great. It must take a lot of your time to throw parties like this for everyone.”

“Thank you!” Herc beamed at him. “None of them ever appreciate the effort I put into it.”

Alex rolled his eyes, gave Lafayette’s arm a tug. “Let’s get you a drink.” As he pulled him away from Hercules he leaned closer and whined, “Stop being such a kiss ass. You’re making the rest of us look bad.” 

Lafayette chuckled as he accepted a beer from Alex. “I was just being nice. Maybe you should try it.”

“I’m nice! I’m nice all the time.”

Lafayette just laughed harder. “I’m just teasing you.” He reached out his arm to steady Alex as he stumbled a bit. “Are you alright?”

“M’fine,” Alex mumbled. 

“You’re a little drunk, yes?”

“Just a little bit.” He glanced up at Lafayette, who was staring back at him. He held eye contact for a moment too long and felt his face start to heat up. He glanced in the other direction to hide the color creeping into his cheeks and spotted some of his friends sitting on the sofa. He tugged on Lafayette’s arm, steering him in their direction. “Come on, let’s introduce you to people.”

The two girls on the couch looked up from their conversation as Alex approached, dragging Lafayette behind him. Alex introduced him to the two of them, Eliza and Angelica. While Eliza smiled at Lafayette and made small talk, Angelica glanced at Alex and gave him a knowing grin before taking another sip of her drink. Alex rolled his eyes, letting himself sink into the cushions beside Lafayette. 

“So, how did you two meet?” Eliza asked, curious. 

“Alex is the RA on my floor,” Lafayette said, shrugging. “So I guess we met my first day at Columbia.”

Angelica raised her eyebrows. “Is that allowed?” 

Alex glared at her, opened his mouth to say something, but was cut off by Lafayette.

“Is what allowed?” He cocked his head to the side, eyebrows pulling together in confusion. 

“Nothing,” Alex said quickly. “Angelica’s just drunk.”

“I am not.”

Sensing the tension, Eliza switched subjects. “You have an accent. Where are you from?”

While Lafayette launched into a description of his hometown in France, Alex shot Angelica a look, taking out his phone and sending her a text. 

“We’re not dating. Just friends.”

Angelica glanced at her phone and let out a quiet breath of laughter, drawing the attention of the other two. “Sorry. A friend just sent me something funny,” she said making pointed eye contact with Alex. She quickly typed a response. 

“No. You’re not.”

Alex chewed the inside of cheek, glancing at her out of the corner of his eye as he sent a response. 

“Yes. We are. Stop being an ass.”

The response was almost immediate. “You don’t look at friends like that. Trust me.”

He stood up abruptly, drawing everyone’s eyes. “I just need another drink. Be right back.” 

Angelica finished the rest of her drink in one gulp and followed after him, meeting him in the kitchen. “Is it allowed though? Seriously, I want to know.”

“Jesus, Angelica,” he said, bringing one hand up to rub the side of his face. “Technically? It’s frowned upon. He doesn’t know that I’m interested though, and I’d like to keep it that way until I decide to do something about it.” He poured some lime juice into his drink, stirring it before taking a sip. 

“Well, when are you going to tell him? It seems like he likes you too, you know.”

“What? No.” Alex shook his head, more to himself than Angelica. “No, he’s just friendly.”

She laughed, nearly spilling the drink she was pouring. “Alex. Maybe you’re just too drunk to notice, but he’s been very, well, close to you. He looks at you a lot too. When you’re busy texting people and not paying attention.” 

“That was your fault,” he griped. “Anyway, I think you’re just misconstruing it. Have you looked at him? He’s out of my league.”

Angelica made a sound of annoyance, and Alex realized his mistake a bit too late. “Well, we both know you have a tendency to go for people who are out of your league. Somehow, you miraculously actually seem to be successful with them.”

Alex noted the slight hurt in her voice. “Sorry. Didn’t mean it like that. You were out of my league too, okay? Feel better?”

She sighed. “Yeah, I guess. Look, I know you’re an idiot, and yes he is probably out of your league, but I think you actually have a chance. You have a tendency to get people to like you. Somehow.” She added the last word with a bit of a bite as they headed back to the other two, but Alex couldn’t help but smile. Maybe Angelica was right. Maybe he did have a chance. 

When he sat back down, he placed himself a little bit closer to Lafayette so that their legs brushed up against each other. Angelica gave him a knowing smirk, but he couldn’t bring himself to care. He took a deep breath, steadying himself as the room swayed a little, and leaned his head against Laf’s shoulder. Despite his efforts to stay focused on the conversation, he found his mind drifting as the alcohol clouded his brain. He snapped back into reality as Angelica addressed Lafayette. 

“So, you have a girlfriend yet?” she asked with a slight smile. “Or a boyfriend?”

“Non. No one has worked out yet.”

“Really? Don’t take this the wrong way, because I’m not hitting on you, but you’re very good looking. I’m just surprised no one’s snatched you up yet.”

Lafayette laughed a little nervously, and Alex felt his heart pounding in his chest. “I think I just do not want to rush to things. Especially when I am not so sure how the other person feels.”

Angelica smiled, nodding her head. “Makes sense.” 

After a beat of silence Lafayette stood up, wriggling out from where Alex was leaning against him. “I am in need of another beer. Eliza, do you want anything?”

“Oh, a cider if you don’t mind. Thank you.”

“What about me?” Alex whined from his spot on the couch. 

Laf chuckled, glancing down at the coffee table in front of them. “Alexander, you still have more than half your drink left.” He smiled to himself as he walked back to the tub of ice with the bottled drinks. 

Once Lafayette was out of earshot, Eliza leaned forward. “So, he likes you.”

Alex choked on his drink as he went to swallow, coughing for a moment before he could speak. “Did he say something to you?” 

“No, but it’s obvious, isn’t it?”

Angelica turned to her, smirking. “Alex has no clue.”

Eliza cocked her head to the side, squinting at him a bit. “Well, he always has been sort of oblivious, hasn’t he?”

“I can hear you guys. I’m right here,” he said, crossing his arms in front of his chest and scowling. 

Eliza simply shrugged, while Angelica laughed. Alex sat up a little straighter as Lafayette returned, holding two bottles and laughing with Hercules who was walking beside him. He passed the cider to Eliza before taking his seat beside Alex again. Herc plopped himself in between the two girls, placing his drink in front of him. 

“I like your friend, Alex. You can bring him around anytime.”

“I’m starting to get the feeling you all like him more than me.” Alex was nearly pouting. 

“I told you, it’s because I am nice to them,” Lafayette said a little smugly, obviously pleased to have won their approval. 

“It helps when you haven’t dated half the group as well,” Angelica quipped, laughing.

Alex winced, glancing at Lafayette, but he didn’t seem too bothered by the fact. He did look a little surprised however as he asked, “Oh really? My instincts tell me it’s Angelica and Eliza, not Hercules, but would that not be weird? They are sisters, no?”

Hercules nearly spit out his drink as he tried to stop himself from laughing. Once he composed himself he told Lafayette, “For the record, I have never dated Alex.”

“And yes,” Eliza added. “It is weird.”

“It’s not that weird, you guys,” Alex mumbled from his spot where he had sunken further back into the cushions. Alex looked to Angelica for backup, who had knowingly dated him after her sister did, but she kept her mouth shut. 

“It is weird,” Herc agreed, reaching over to ruffle his hair. Alex tried to move out of his reach to no avail, and made a displeased noise as he tried to get his hair to lay flat again. 

“Okay, fine. Can we stop picking on me now?” 

Lafayette reached around his shoulders to give his arm a reassuring squeeze. Alex smiled at the contact, scooting even closer to him. As he moved, Alex realized the alcohol had kicked in a little more, making him feel wobbly. He leaned his head back against Laf and closed his eyes for a moment, listening to the voices around him but not focusing on their words. He felt Lafayette shift against him a few times, reaching for his drink or leaning forward to listen to the others. After what felt like only a minute, he was being gently shaken back to reality. “How are you feeling, Alex?” Lafayette’s voice was quiet, near his ear. 

“M'okay. A little tired. Was a long week.” 

Lafayette hummed in agreement. “Do you need to go back to the dorm? I can help you get back.”

“No, I wanna stay. I’ll be fine.”

“Alright, whatever you want. No more alcohol though.”

Alex thought about protesting, but as he went to open his eyes the room started to spin a bit. “Okay. No more for now.”

“Good. Now the others are going to play a drinking game. Do you want to get some fresh air while they do?”

“Don’t wanna miss the game,” he whined, burying his face in Lafayette’s shoulder. 

Lafayette let out a little breath of laughter. “You just agreed to no more alcohol, mon cher.” Alex made a small noise that Lafayette took as agreement as he pulled him to his feet. “Now, where is your coat?” 

Alex shrugged, causing Lafayette to sigh and glance around. When he couldn’t find it he grabbed his own coat and draped it over Alex’s shoulders, guiding him out the door and down the stairwell. As they neared the bottom, Alex glanced at the coat with confusion. “This isn’t mine,” he said as he suddenly realized. 

“Non, c’est à moi.” He was a little tired and figured Alex would be too drunk to notice what language he was speaking anyway. Instead, he was surprised when he slipped comfortably into French.

“Oh. Merci. Seras-tu froid?”

“No, Alex. I’m alright, I promise. Just need you to get some fresh air.” He paused for a moment, pushing the door open for the two of them and sitting down on the steps outside. “You never mentioned you speak French.”

Alex shrugged, seeming a little more alert with the chill of the night air on his face. “Just something I picked up.” He leaned over, laying his head against Lafayette’s chest as Laf draped his arm around his shoulders. He snuggled into the soft material of Laf’s sweater, breathing in deeply. “You’re warm.” 

Laf smiled, squeezing him a little tighter and leaning his head down so his cheek was resting on top of Alex’s head. “Good. Have to keep you warm out here.” 

Alex brought his hand up to Laf’s stomach, slowly running his fingers over his sweater. “This is soft,” he whispered, trailing his fingers a little lower. “Looks good on you too. Green is a good color on you.” 

Lafayette made a quiet noise of agreement mixed with pleasure while Alex traced his fingers back up his abs to finally rest at his chest as he tilted his head up to look at him. “Pretty much everything looks good on you though. Consequence of being so gorgeous I guess.”

Lafayette looked down at him, biting his lip as he thought. “You’re very drunk, Alexander.” 

Alex looked at him with big doe eyes, blinking slowly. “I don’t feel as drunk now. Think I’m sobering up.” He moved his hand over to Lafayette’s arm now, squeezing his bicep lightly. 

Lafayette groaned quietly to himself, sitting up a little straighter. “You’re still drunk though. You’ve had a lot tonight. Hercules said you started drinking quite a bit before I got here. And you are littler than I am. More light weight.”

“I’m not that little,” Alex grumbled, rubbing his face into Laf’s chest again. 

Lafayette grinned, using all of self-control to avoid pulling Alex up to kiss him. “Of course not.”

Alex didn’t respond. Just buried his face further. 

“Alex, you know that I like you a lot right?”

He pulled his face out, peeking up at Laf with an unspoken question in his eyes. 

“As more than friends. I just don’t want you to make any decisions you regret because you’re drunk.”

Alex laughed, and Lafayette was concerned for a minute before he smiled up at him. “Sorry. It’s just, well-” He chuckled to himself again. “Well, I drank so much because I was nervous. I like you too. A lot. Figured it would help me talk to you about this. Now I’m cock blocking myself.”

Lafayette laughed with him, squeezing him close. They stayed like that for a little while, close to one another in the cold night air. They talked, feeling less restricted and awkward with things out in the open. After some time passed, Lafayette stretched out, causing Alex to sit up again. “Your friends are probably done with their game now. They’re probably wondering where we are.”

Alex shrugged, standing up nonetheless. “They probably just think we’re fucking.” He laughed at Laf’s raised eyebrows. “It wouldn’t be the first time I snuck away during a party to get some. But you’re right, we should go back inside. Don’t want to miss the end of the party. They’re probably all hammered now. It should be fun.” He smiled up at Lafayette, happiness rushing through his veins as he really began to grasp the idea that this beautiful man wanted him. He grasped his hand briefly, giving it a tight squeeze before returning to Herc’s apartment.


	6. Chapter 6

Alex woke up the next morning to the sound of insistent knocking on his door. He blinked a few times, adjusting to the sunlight peeking in through his blinds, and noted a subtle pounding in his head. He got up slowly, stumbling a little bit, and yanked the door open. 

Lafayette was standing there, fully dressed and holding two coffees and a paper bag. “Good morning!” he said cheerfully, making his way into Alex’s room and sitting down at his desk chair, draping his jacket over the back of it. “I thought you could use some coffee and food.”

“What time is it?” Alex asked groggily, rubbing at his eyes to bring the world into focus, his contacts sticking uncomfortably. 

“Eleven thirty,” Laf responded, pulling a pastry from the bag and taking a bite. 

“Shit.” He flopped back down onto his bed and rolled over onto his back so he could face Lafayette. “I slept that long?”

“You had an exhausting week and then instead of resting, you went and got drunk at a party. You needed the sleep, I think. Hungry?” He held out the bag, and Alex nodded without getting up to take it from him. “You can’t eat lying down like that.” 

He groaned, but pulled himself up into a sitting position, gratefully accepting the bag as Lafayette walked over and handed it to him. He took a bite and moaned as the buttery flavor filled his mouth. After he swallowed he looked over at Lafayette. “Coffee?”

He shook his head and sighed, but handed over the coffee anyway. “Not even a please. You’re really not a morning person.”

“No,” Alex agreed, taking a long drink and relishing the bitter taste on his tongue. “I’m not. That’s why I need the coffee. Thanks, by the way.” They sat in relative silence as they ate and sipped their drinks. Alex thought about the night before, how physically close they had been, the things they had said. He began to worry that it was somehow a mistake. That he was remembering it wrong, or that Lafayette had just said those things because he was drunk and he felt bad for him. As he finished his coffee, Laf stood up and grabbed the cup from him, placing it back on the desk with his own. Instead of resuming his spot on the chair however, he sat on the bed next to Alex, resting his hand on his thigh and gazing at him. Between the placement of Laf’s hand and his general closeness, Alex felt a sharp pang of need. He suddenly forgot about all the reasons he was worried. All he could think about was how much he wanted to be even closer to this man. 

He brought his hand up to the side of Laf’s face, gently brushing his fingers along his cheek. “Now that I’m not drunk, can I kiss you?” 

In response, Lafayette put his hand on the small of Alex’s back and pulled him closer, gently lowering his face until their lips were touching. It was slow at first, experimental, and filled with all the built up anticipation of months of infatuation. Alex sucked on his lip and pushed his tongue forward, urging Laf to open. He felt desperate for more, but Lafayette took his time exploring his mouth slowly, running his hands across his back and using gentle pressure to keep him held close. Alex moaned as Laf bit his lip gently, testing it out to make sure it was okay. Then he was pulling away, and Alex tried to lean forward for more until he realized where his mouth was moving. He felt lips on his neck, kissing and nipping a trail down to his shoulder. He threw his head back and bit his own lip, stifling another moan. 

“You like this?” he asked as he bit gently near his collarbone, his voice low and seductive.

“Yeah,” Alex breathed, finding himself unable to form a full sentence. All the air was knocked out of his lungs, replaced with want. He was growing frustrated at how careful Lafayette was being. The slow pace mixed with the timidity of it. He wanted more, but he was too dizzy with the feeling of lips on skin to properly verbalize his needs. Instead, he reached down to Laf’s hips, running his hands along the skin just underneath the hem of shirt, impatient to touch. He moved his hands further up, tracing his fingers along the pattern of his abs. “Shirt?” he prompted, tugging up the bottom of the material. 

Lafayette pulled back, helping him remove it. Alex couldn’t help but stare, drinking in the sight of him. Dark skin pulled tight over perfectly defined muscles. “Fuck,” Alex sighed, leaning forward to touch him again. “You’re so gorgeous. How are you real?”

Laf just laughed, pulling him into another kiss. Alex took the moment to reach back and pull his hair loose from his bun. He ran his hands through the curls tugging lightly as he moaned into his mouth. Lafayette was reaching down now, pulling Alex’s shirt over his head and tossing it to the side. “Your skin is so beautiful,” he said against Alex’s lips, tracing his fingers up and down his now exposed torso. “So soft.” He pushed him back so Alex was on his back, his hips between Lafayette’s straddled thighs. “This okay?” he asked, leaning forward over him. 

Alex nodded, making a small noise of agreement in the back of his throat. Lafayette leaned down, kissing him all over. His arms, his chest, his stomach. He moved lower, towards the waist band of his sweatpants, and Alex shifted as he felt his dick stiffen in anticipation. “Excited?” Laf asked, arching an eyebrow as he eyed the way Alex’s pants had tented. He just groaned in response, taking Laf’s hand and guiding it down. He let out a gasp as his hand made contact, arching slightly into the touch. Lafayette grabbed him over his pants more firmly, giving him short strokes. Alex couldn’t help the low whine that escaped him. 

“More?” he breathed, pressing his hips up again.

“More what?” Lafayette teased, releasing his grip and running his fingers lightly up and down the outline of his cock. 

“Want you to touch me,” he managed, grinding his hips against the mattress in frustration. “Want you to touch me for real.”

Lafayette moved back up his body, kissing him deeply. He pulled away just enough to whisper against Alex’s lips, “You’re very impatient, mon cher.” 

Alex looked up at him, tried to make his eyes big and pleading, feeling too warm under Laf’s gaze. “Please?” he whined softly. 

“I will.” He brought his lips back down to bite at Alex’s lower lip, dipping his hips low enough so that their dicks briefly brushed against each other. “Eventually.” 

Alex threw his head back against the mattress, groaning in frustration. Lafayette only smiled mischievously at him, continuing to tease him over his pants as he bit and sucked a purple spot into his chest. “Fuck,” Alex moaned, bucking his hips. “I’ve been waiting so long already. Stop being a jerk and just touch me.”

“You think I’m being mean?” Laf asked, looking down at him with dark eyes. “Should I stop then?” He started to pull away, sitting up. 

“No,” Alex growled, reaching up and pulling his head back down to crash their lips together. “Want you. Want this. Just want to you to hurry the fuck up.” He slid his hands down to grab at Lafayette’s ass, made a pleased noise into his mouth as he felt the strong, rounded muscles there. Alex pulled Laf down further so that he was on top of him, grinding their hips together. He felt a sting of lust as he noticed his dick growing harder against him.

Lafayette reached down, bringing his hand to the waistband of Alex’s sweatpants, running his fingers just along the inside. Alex shivered at the contact, brought his own hand down to try to push his pants down further, but it was swatted away. Lafayette resumed his teasing, maddeningly slow. Alex felt desire pool in the bottom of his stomach, squirming and gasping with need. “Please,” he panted, moving his hips up again. 

“Please what?” Laf asked, snapping the waistband against his skin. “What do you want, Alexander?” 

He made a short noise of frustration. “I told you. Want you to touch me.”

Lafayette moved his hand lower, brushing his fingers against the skin of his dick. “Is this all you want? For me to touch you?”

Alex shivered, moaning at the taunt. “Want your lips on my cock. Want to feel your tongue, licking up my shaft, sucking me like you mean it.”

At that, Lafayette pulled his sweatpants down to his thighs, eyeing his cock with interest for a few beats before taking him into his mouth. 

“Oh fuck,” Alex moaned loudly, involuntarily bucking his hips up into his Laf’s mouth. “Fuck, your mouth feels so good, babe.” 

Lafayette hummed in approval, and Alex felt his dick throb in response. Laf began to focus his effort on Alex’s cock, circling the head with his tongue and bobbing his head back down to take even more of him in his mouth. Alex was gasping and moaning, breathless and losing himself in the sensations. He lifted his head just enough to glance down at Lafayette, soft lips wrapped around his dick, peering up at him through thick eyelashes, toned muscles tensed, holding the rest of his body in place as he swallowed Alex down again and again. The sight was enough to tip Alex over the edge, and he gasped out, “Can I finish in your- your mouth?” Instead of saying anything, Lafayette just doubled his efforts, drawing Alex’s orgasm out of him as he took him into the back of his throat. Alex threw his head back down against the mattress as his body tensed up, in a state of complete bliss. He felt his dick throb as he came into Lafayette’s throat, moaning in pleasure as he swallowed around him. Too soon, he was pulling off of him, giving him a satisfied smile as he laid on his side and pulled Alex into a kiss. 

“Shit,” Alex panted, running his hand through his messed up hair. “Where’d a nice guy like you learn to give a blow job like that?” Lafayette didn’t respond, just kissed him again, rubbing his own erection against the side of Alex’s leg. “You need help with that?” he joked, eyeing the large bulge under Laf’s jeans. “I think it’s your turn after all.”

Alex moved to unzip his fly, tugging the jeans down as much as he could. Lafayette stood up, kicking them off the rest of the way. He moved to get back on the bed, but Alex stopped him, standing up as well. He wrapped his arms around him, kissing right under his ear and whispering, “I have a different idea.” He dropped down to his knees, nosing at the outline of his dick through his boxer briefs. He brought his hands to his waist band, pausing. “May I?” he asked, biting his lip and looking eager. 

“Of course,” Lafayette replied, his voice steady but the look in his eyes one of undisguised lust. 

Alex pulled them down and sighed with pleasure as Laf’s cock sprang out. He licked his lips, running his thumb over the head. “I’m still not sure you’re real. No one can be this perfect.” He leaned forward, kissing up his shaft slowly. “Even your dick is pretty.” He gave him a few licks before popping the head of his cock into his mouth, using his tongue and lips in a way that had Laf twisting his fingers into Alex’s hair, encouraging him to take his dick further. 

Soon enough, Lafayette felt his orgasm building up, knew he was close. He slowed down, considering, looking at the beautiful man below him with his cock stuffed in his mouth. “I’m so close. Can I come on you? On your face?”

Alex didn’t think twice before groaning with delight and nodding his head, the thought filling him with desire. Then Laf was pulling out, stroking himself to completion and streaking Alex’s face with a generous amount of cum. He aimed for Alex’s open mouth, cheeks, forehead. He looked so pretty, flushed and messy, staring up at him with large, wide eyes. Lafayette collapsed back onto the bed, sighing with contentment, as Alex rose to his feet, licking the cum from his lips and reaching for a washcloth from his nightstand. He poured some water onto it, wiping away the traces of their actions from his face. Then he walked back to the bed, falling next to Laf and draping one arm across his body. “Thank you,” Lafayette said, a little shakily. 

“Anytime,” Alex replied, tracing patterns into Laf’s skin, content to lay there next to him all day. For once, he was not anxious to get up and work on one of his many projects. He was happy to do nothing for the rest of his life if it meant he could stay right there next to this perfect man, glowing with the knowledge that the attraction was mutual.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> By the way my tumblr is ilovefoodandgirls if you want to hang out on the internet with me.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it's a little short, but it was the best natural stopping point. 
> 
> Thank you all so much for the comments and kudos! I kind of just dove into this after not writing for a long while, so I'm glad you're all enjoying it.

Weeks passed, and the city grew cold and dark as they approached the middle of winter. It took three or four layers of clothing just to walk across campus, and Alex found himself stuck inside his building most of the time, avoiding the stinging December wind whenever possible. Finals were drawing near, so in a way the weather actually worked out in his favor. It allowed him to focus, taking away any distractions that the city offered. Well, all but one handsome distraction who happened live across the hall. Lafayette was in Alex’s room more often than his own at this point. They would spend cold nights in the dorm room together, bundled up in a blanket on the bed watching their way through the movies available on Netflix. The television had a permanent spot in his room now. He would set the heat to 80 degrees, complaining about how freezing the city got and justifying his actions with the outrageous price of tuition. Other nights, busier ones, the two of them would just sit silently, doing homework and writing papers with the comforting knowledge that someone else was around. 

With one week before finals would start, the first considerable snowfall of the season had arrived. Alex stared out the window as the large, fluffy clumps of snow fell from the sky, buried in a large sweatshirt, while Lafayette watched him from the bed. After a few moments, he turned around, a look of disgust on his face. “There’s so much of it. How am I supposed to get to class tomorrow?”

Lafayette couldn’t help but smile, and despite his annoyance Alex wanted to melt at the sight of it. “You’ll be fine. I think it’s pretty. It looks so clean. So sparkly.”

“Yeah until everyone in the city steps all over it and then it’s just brown slush, making people wet and cold.”

Lafayette hummed in agreement. “How about this? When you get back from class, I’ll be here to warm you up?”

Alex smiled, not missing the innuendo in his voice. “Yeah? That might make it a little more bearable. Not sure if I’ll be able to pay attention in class though, knowing what’s coming later.” He walked back to the bed, leaning down to catch Lafayette’s lips in a quick kiss. Laf tried to pull him back down, to capture him on the bed and use his powers of persuasion to convince Alex to abandon his preparation for finals in favor of more enjoyable activities, but he stepped away laughing. “I told you already, I have a ton of work I’ve been putting off. You said you’d leave me alone if I watched that French film with you last night.”

“But we barely watched the film, so that’s not really fair,” Lafayette argued, reaching for him again. 

Alex snorted. “That’s your own fault. Hard to focus on the screen when I’ve got your cock in my mouth.” He sat down at the desk, grabbing a book from his pile of them on the floor. “I’m not losing my scholarship because you’re horny.”

“You won’t lose your scholarship if you get a 3.8 instead of a 4.0,” Lafayette groaned from the bed, falling back dramatically. Alex glanced at him again, and he felt a newly familiar warmth fill his body. He had a strong temptation to throw the book back on the floor, crawl into the bed next to him, and spend the next few hours touching and kissing, exploring the landscape of his body until he had it completely memorized. Instead he sighed, turned back around, and flipped to the most recent chapter they had discussed in class. It took all of his willpower to resign himself to an afternoon of studying developmental journalism while Lafayette was only a few feet away. 

 

While sitting in class, attempting to follow along with the review for the final exam, Alex felt his phone vibrate in his pocket. He pulled it out, trying to hide the screen below the desk to avoid a disapproving look from his professor. Expecting a message from Lafayette, he was surprised to instead see a text from Evan, his boss. He tapped the screen, opening the message and reading the words over several times. He felt his stomach drop. Evan wanted to talk to him after his class. It sounded innocent enough, but if it wasn't something bad Evan almost certainly would have waited until the next RA meeting or texted him whatever it is he wanted to tell him. 

Now, instead of being distracted by daydreams of Lafayette, warm and beautiful and naked, he was distracted by thoughts of what Evan needed to discuss with him, and he had a good idea what, or rather who, the topic of conversation might be. He tried to think back over the last few weeks, if there was anyone who might have noticed their relationship and thought to tell Evan. He couldn’t think of anyone specifically, but they hadn’t exactly been discrete. Alex tended to have some trouble keeping quiet, and the dorm room walls weren’t very thick. 

As he walked back into the building, he began pulling off his hat and scarf, unzipping his coat. He stood in front of the office door, cheeks and nose still red from the cold, and knocked twice, hoping that Evan wasn’t in there. Maybe he had to leave to deal with something important. Maybe he got sick and went home for the day. He waited, shrugging off his coat as the heat from the building began to seep into his body, the layers underneath starting to make him uncomfortably warm. He was about to turn around and leave when the door opened. 

“Ah, Alex. Sorry about that, I was on a phone call. Come on in.”

Alex shuffled in, arms full of his winter clothing. He dropped all of it, as well as his bag, on the floor before taking a seat across from Evan’s desk. “So, what’s up? Something about finals week? Making sure everyone leaves for break on time?” He tried to sound casual, not letting his voice betray how nervous he felt. He could feel his blood pounding under his skin, feeling trapped, cornered. 

“No, I think we covered all of that during the last weekly meeting. I actually need to talk to you about something one of the residents on your floor said to me the other day.” Shit. 

“Is someone having trouble with their roommate or something? I told them I have an open door policy. They should have come to me about it instead of bothering you-”

“No,” he interrupted. “Alex, please let me talk.”

Alex chewed the inside of his lip, willing himself to stay quiet when all of instincts were shouting at him to talk his way out trouble. 

“Someone just mentioned that you’ve been spending, well, an abnormal amount of time with a freshman who lives on your floor.”

“Oh? That’s all?” He laughed, trying to play it off. “Lafayette right?”

“Yes,” Evan said, eyeing him with doubt. “It’s just that we can’t have any sort of inappropriate relationships between RAs and their residents. We talked about that during summer training, as I’m sure you remember.”

Alex cocked his head to the side, trying to put on his best confused face. “Of course I remember that, but what do you mean inappropriate? I’m just trying to help him adjust. He doesn’t have a lot of friends here.”

“The student who came to me said they heard-” he paused clearing his throat and looking a bit embarrassed. “Well, they said they heard the two of you making certain noises…” he trailed off, failing to hold eye contact. 

“What? Noises?” Alex scrunched his face, feigning ignorance. “Oh, wait. Oh god, this is embarrassing. We were just watching some stupid movie.”

Evan didn’t say anything, just gave him a blank stare. 

“There was a sex scene,” he clarified, lifting his hands to cover his face. “Oh god, I can’t believe someone thought that we were…” 

Alex peeked out from between his fingers and was pleased to see that Evan looked relieved. He slowly lowered his hands, giving a small laugh. 

“Well that’s good then. I didn’t want to have to write you up or anything. You know, I just have to take things like that seriously.”

“Of course.” Alex gave him a smile. “I completely understand. I’m glad we got it cleared up. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have a lot of work to catch up on.” He stood up, scooping his belongings into his arms, and quickly crossed the room to the door. Once it was securely closed behind him, he took a steadying breath and let his body relax. “Shit,” he muttered quietly, before heading towards the stairs. 

Lafayette was waiting in the hall by his door, leaning casually against the wall as he held a book open, scanning the page. He looked up as Alex approached, breaking into a smile. “You took longer than usual! I thought maybe you were trapped under all of that snow,” he teased. 

Alex forced himself to smile, and ushered him into his room. Once inside, he dropped all of things on the floor and let out a frustrated sigh. 

“Mon cher? What’s wrong? Something happen in class?”

“No. Someone mentioned that we were an item to my boss.”

“Oh. So, what is the problem?”

Alex made another noise of frustration, too aggravated and wound up to explain calmly. “The problem is that I’m in danger of getting written up for that. I can’t afford this room or my meal plan without this position. Goddammit. Who would even tell Evan something like that? What the fuck does it matter to anyone else?”

Lafayette looked down at him with concern in his eyes, unsure how to comfort him. “Alex, just breathe. So what happened? Did he write you up?”

Following Laf’s instructions, he took a couple of deep breaths before answering. “No. I lied. Made something up about us just being buddies who watch soft movie porn together. But if anyone says something again it could cost me my job.”

“So it’s fine, Alex. Everything will be okay.”

“We have to be discrete from now on, okay? No more loud sex.”

Lafayette gave a short laugh before he was able to stop himself. “I’m sorry,” he said after receiving a glare from Alex. “It’s just that you’re the one who seems to have the problem keeping quiet.”

He cursed, looking down at his feet. He knew it was true. Alex had a tendency to get very enthusiastic and loud when he lost himself to the pleasure of having his cock handled. “Yeah, you’re right. I just can’t help it sometimes. Involuntary reaction.”

“I might have an idea,” Lafayette said, his smile wicked. Alex gave him a questioning look, but he just smiled wider. “It’s a surprise. You can find out tomorrow.”

“What the hell, Laf?”

“Surprise,” he said with finality.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tumblr is ilovefoodandgirls if you want to follow or send me asks


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Planned on posting this tomorrow, but I was too excited. 
> 
> Enjoy!

When Alex got back from his student government meeting the next evening, the first thing he noticed was a small box outside his door, unmarked and sealed up with packing tape. He picked it up and inspected it before shrugging, bringing it into his room. He heard a crinkling noise as he stepped inside and looked down at his feet. Under one shoe was a small note that had clearly been slipped under his door. He picked it up, noticing Lafayette’s handwriting right away, and read the couple of sentences quickly. 

For your predicament. I cannot wait to use it with you later.  
-Lafayette

Alex felt a rush of excitement, scrambling to find something sharp to open the box with. He settled for his keys and was soon unwrapping the tissue paper inside to unveil its contents. He lifted the object out carefully, holding it up to get a better look. It was a solid black gag with a silicone ball and leather straps. While simple, it seemed to be high quality material, and Alex felt a swell of arousal at the thought of Lafayette picking it out for him. 

He felt a vibration in his pocket and pulled out his phone to see a new text message from Lafayette. 

Did you get my surprise yet? It should be there by now.

Alex went to respond, then stopped himself, coming up with a better idea. He popped the silicone ball in his mouth, slowly buckling the straps behind his head. He pulled out his hair tie, giving his head a shake to make the hair fall messily over his shoulders. Made his eyes look large as he snapped a picture with his phone camera, sending it off to Lafayette. A minute later he received a reply.

Don’t you look positively delectable. Can’t wait to get back!

Alex knew Laf would be home from intramural dodgeball in ten or fifteen minutes, and he figured he’d be pleasantly surprised to find him waiting with the gag on. He sat down and pulled out a book, intending to get some reading for class done. Instead, his mind kept drifting back to his cock, which was beginning to get hard with the thought of what would soon be happening. He gave up after five minutes, dropping the book on his nightstand and unzipping his jeans. He pulled himself out of his underwear and began to stroke himself slowly. He let his mind wander, thinking about Lafayette touching him, licking him, sucking him. 

A few minutes into this, he heard a knock on the door. He started at the noise and quickly tucked himself back into his pants before looking out the peep hole in the door to see Lafayette. He opened it carefully, making sure to stand back so no one in the hall would see him. Laf entered, seeming confused at first, but then his eyes fell on Alex and he broke into a large grin. 

In a rare moment, Alex felt almost shy under Lafayette’s gaze. Clearly his plan to surprise him by wearing the gag before he arrived was a success. He took a moment, looking Alex up and down, drinking in the sight of him. Despite being fully clothed, not being able to use his voice made Alex feel vulnerable and naked. Normally, if things felt too tense, too loaded, he could say something witty to break the silence and lighten the atmosphere. Instead he was trapped by the space between them and Laf’s silence, not sure how to proceed. 

Luckily for him, it wasn’t long before Laf was stepping forward, bridging the space and pushing him against the wall. He dove for Alex’s neck and jawline, kissing and nibbling the skin there. “You look so pretty like this,” he whispered into his skin. “Your mouth open and stuffed full. I’ve been thinking about it all day.”

Alex groaned behind the gag, feeling his legs go weak as he let his weight be held up by the wall and Lafayette’s body. “None of that. You have to be quiet, Alex. Remember?” He punctuated the question with a kiss to his collarbone as he looked up at Alex with a spark of amusement in his eyes. 

He nodded his head quickly, willing himself to stay silent as Laf trailed his hands down further, lifting up his shirt and pulling it over his head. He stepped back, looking him over, but then Alex saw the expression on his face change from excitement to something else that he couldn’t quite put his finger on. “Um, pause for a moment?”

Alex cocked his head to the side, confused at the sudden turn of events. Lafayette took a step forward and gently lifted his head away from the wall, unbuckling the gag and removing it from his mouth. Alex stretched his jaw, adjusting to the emptiness and the slight ache of being stretched open. After he felt a little more comfortable he looked up at Lafayette, worried that he had done something wrong, something that made him want to stop. 

“Sorry, I just thought that before we do anything else we should talk.” His voice trailed off at the end, sounding uncharacteristically unsure of himself.

“I thought the whole point of that,” he motioned toward the gag with his head, “was so that I couldn’t talk.”

“I know. It’s just that-” he stopped, trying to form the right words. “While I find the thought of you gagged very appealing and practical for our current predicament, how will I know if you need to stop or if something is wrong?”

“I’ll be fine. I doubt you’d ever do anything I wouldn’t like.”

“No, Alex. That’s not good enough,” his voice inching towards frustration. “I need to be sure you’re okay with everything while it’s happening. I wouldn’t want to accidentally hurt you or make you uncomfortable.”

Alex could see the concern etched into his face. He was slightly irked that this whole thing had ruined the mood, was sure he could handle whatever Laf threw at him, but he knew if the situation was reversed he would want to be sure too. “Okay, how about if I’m uncomfortable I hum something?”

“Like a song?” Lafayette nodded quietly to himself, as if thinking it through. “Yes, that could work.”

“Okay, if I have a problem with something I’ll hum the Imperial March.”

“Really? Star Wars?” Laf asked, one eyebrow raised and an amused expression on his face. 

Alex felt himself blush. “Look, do you want to do this whole humming thing or not?”

“Yes, sorry. So if I hear Darth Vader enter the room I’ll stop.”

He rolled his eyes. “I would hope you would stop touching my dick regardless of my humming if Darth Vader burst into my dorm room.”

“True,” Laf allowed. “Alright, may I put this back on now?” He held up the gag with a sinful smile. 

 

A short while later, Alex was laid out on the bed wearing nothing but the gag while Lafayette licked up and down his cock, starting at the base and slowly making his way to the head, teasing the slit with his tongue. Even with his mouth full, it took a lot of discipline from Alex to not make any noise. He trapped every whine, groan, and moan before it could get out of his throat, choking them back down with visible effort. He scrunched his eyes tightly closed as he felt the head of his dick slip into Laf’s mouth, relishing the warm, wet sensations. He had one hand twisted in the sheet and the other gripping tightly into his own thigh, grounding himself to avoid trying to yell out in pleasure. Lafayette worked him up and down, sliding his tongue along the shaft in way that had him writhing on the mattress. Just as he felt his orgasm bubbling close to the surface, Laf pulled off, licking his lips and smirking up at him. Alex couldn’t help the small whine that escaped him looking at the enticing sight between his legs and longing for those lips to close around him again. 

Instead, Lafayette pushed his legs open wider with his knees bent so he was more exposed. He trailed one finger delicately lower from the base of his cock. Alex made a soft sound in the back of his throat and Laf looked up at him, leaning forward to make eye contact. “Alex? Is this okay?” he asked, his finger inching closer to his exposed hole. Alex nodded quickly, his hips bucking up just a bit. Laf laughed lightly at the display, then leaned down. Suddenly, Alex felt wet warmth as Lafayette prodded gently with his tongue, licking small circles around his entrance. He pushed his hips down, trying to get himself more pressure. He could feel the saliva dripping off of his chin, and he would have been embarrassed by it if he weren’t so turned on. He felt Lafayette push in very slightly with his tongue, stretching out his opening. He choked back a moan and brought one hand to Laf’s hair, digging his fingers in the curls and giving encouraging pressure without really pushing him forward. He pulled back and then pushed in a few times, getting further and further with each thrust. Alex relaxed into the feeling of it, the warmth and the pleasure of being filled. He was soon distracted however, when Lafayette brought a lubed hand up hand to his dick, giving him quick strokes in time with his tongue. 

It was becoming too much, the competing sensations on his ass and his dick. He went to warn Laf of his building orgasm before remembering the gag in his mouth, nothing coming out but a needy, muffled sound. Lafayette pulled back from his ass, whispering near the base of cock, “You like this, Alexander? You’re such a naughty thing, so turned on by my tongue.” He gave him another lick right over his hole. “You going to come for me?” As Alex made another small, garbled noise, he returned to his job of thrusting into Alex with his tongue, and within seconds Alex was finishing, pulsing thick stripes of cum across his stomach. He breathed deeply through his nose, his chest rising and falling as he came back down from a state of post-orgasmic bliss. Opened his eyes to see Laf sitting near his head, smiling down at him. He sat up slowly, pushing himself up with his hands to lean against the headboard. Lafayette reached behind him, gently unbuckling the gag so he could pop it out of his mouth, and Alex quickly reached up to wipe the spit away with the back of his hand.

“Do you know how beautiful you look when you’re coming apart like that, mon chou?”

He knew it was supposed to be seductive, but Alex couldn’t help laughing. “Sorry, but you just ate out my ass and now you’re calling me a cabbage? What the hell?”

“It’s a term of endearment in France,” he said defensively. “Americans call one another pumpkin or honey all the time. It’s not that strange.” 

Alex considered for a moment before making a small noise of agreement. “I guess those are kind of weird too. Cabbages aren’t sweet though.”

“Chou à la crème. Cream puffs. Small and sweet. And messy,” he added, glancing down at Alex’s stomach which was coated with his own semen. 

Alex chuckled. “I guess it is fitting then. I need to take a shower, clean myself up. Did you want me to…?” he trailed off, his eyes briefly flitting over the slight bulge in Lafayette’s shorts. 

“I’m alright for now. Mostly just wanted to give that gag a test run. Thank you though.” 

Alex gathered his things, wrapping his towel a little bit higher than normal to cover the mess on his stomach. As he stepped towards the door, Lafayette was pulling out his laptop and some papers. “You staying here?” he asked, hand on the door knob. 

“Of course. Want to be here when you get back so I can actually hear about your day. The gag is helpful, but I missed your voice, mon chou.” He said the last words pointedly, with a smile. 

Alex rolled his eyes as he turned around to open the door, but he had to admit he liked the thought of Lafayette calling him sweet names that were reserved just for him. He barely noticed the smile creeping onto his face as he made his way to the shower, letting his mind stay in this post-sex, warm, fuzzy space for just a little while longer before he was forced to think about all of his work for finals week again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Following me on tumblr at ilovefoodandgirls so we can hang out on the internet together


	9. Chapter 9

Winter break always had a way of making Alex feel more lost than usual. While all the other students went home to loving families, he scrambled to make plans that wouldn’t leave him homeless while the dorms were closed. Luckily for him, Hercules always had his apartment available when he needed a place to crash, and he never made him feel like a burden for taking him up on the offer to stay there. With Lafayette heading back to France for the holidays and the weather getting steadily colder, Alex was feeling particularly gloomy about the end of the semester. 

As he walked back from his last final on Friday afternoon, he shot jealous glances at the families packing up cars with their kids’ belongings. He wondered what it would feel like to be squashed in the middle seat of a two door car between a sibling and a bag of laundry, telling parents about his classes and his friends, recounting the stories that were family-friendly and smiling to himself about the secretive additions that he wouldn’t share. His pride wouldn’t let him admit it, but he longed to know what it felt like to have a home to go back to, a home that he grew up in with familiar furniture and rooms, familiar people to greet him as he arrived in the neighborhood. He tried to convince himself that growing up the way he did made him stronger, scrappier, more well-equipped to take on life as an adult. He didn’t have anybody to rely on, and therefore he didn’t have anything holding him back. A safety net could choke you if you got too tangled up in it. 

As he got back to his floor, the hallway was a disorderly mess. Students rushing to pack their things, parents lugging suitcases and bags, friends saying their goodbyes and promising to keep in touch over the next month. Perhaps it was just his cynical mood, but Alex suspected they wouldn’t. It was a frenzy of people and movement, and all he really wanted was to lock himself in his room, but he knew he had to be available to help if needed. He figured he was already on thin ice with his boss, and one more strike against him wouldn’t look too good. As he went to pull open his door, barely dodging a small girl running away from her dad, Lafayette came bounding over to him. 

“Mon chou! You’re finally done with all your exams!” His expression changed from joy to concern as he read the sadness in Alex’s face. “Is everything okay?”

Realizing how obvious his mood was coming across, Alex tried to cover it up with a smile. It didn’t quite reach his eyes as he responded, “Yeah, I’m great. A whole month off from all of this work, it’s going to be great. Finally have time to relax.”

Lafayette still seemed concerned, but nodded, leaning against the hallway wall. “I can’t imagine you relaxing for a whole month. You’re going to get two days into break and start the reading for next semester or create a blog about politics or something probably.”

“That blog thing isn’t a bad idea. Bet I could get a ton of readers if I play it right. Thanks for the suggestion.”

“It wasn’t-” Lafayette stopped himself, realizing it wasn’t worth the effort, and shaking his head. “Whatever. You could use the rest though. Those dark circles might be permanent at this point.”

“They add to the overworked college kid aesthetic.”

At that moment, a frazzled-looking mom approached them. “Excuse me,” she said in a voice sounding anything but polite. “Are you the RA?” 

“Yeah,” Alex said reluctantly, sparing a glance back at Lafayette. “You need help with something?” 

“I have some questions about a fine my son received during a room check.”

“Duty calls,” he said to Lafayette as he followed her over to her family, the son looking uncomfortable as Alex tried to explain that, yes, they found alcohol in the room at some point, and no, there was no way to get the money reimbursed. 

 

After an afternoon of answering questions and helping load cars, the night felt blissfully quiet. It was snowing again outside, and without the stress of classwork and studying, without the noise of dozens of rambunctious college kids out in the hall, Alex could almost see how people thought the stuff was pretty. There was a certain fluffy grace in the way it drifted weightlessly through the air, and before it was turned into mush by the ever-present pedestrians of the city, it did look elegant and pure. The way it sparkled in the glow of the streetlights had a calming effect on him, distracting him momentarily from his desire to fast forward through the next lonely month. 

He heard a quick knock at the door and smiled, pulling himself away from the window to let Lafayette into his room. His flight wasn’t until the next morning, and with everyone else on their floor already gone, they had the place to themselves. Lafayette stood in the door frame wearing a pair of flannel pajama bottoms, his chest and arms bare and beautiful as always. Alex stepped forward, tugging him down for a kiss. He meant for it to be quick, just a greeting, but Laf had other plans. 

He pushed Alex back into his room, lips locked together, and closed the door behind them before shoving him down onto the bed. He took both of Alex’s wrists in one hand, pinning them above his head as he continued to mash their lips together. Alex returned the kiss with interest, groaning at the roughness of it. Laf pulled away, biting at the skin below his jaw. As he did so, Alex gave an experimental tug of his arms, finding his grip unyielding. He felt his dick perk up as he bit his lip to stop himself from moaning. “That’s good,” he said, tensing his arm muscles again, met with the same firm hold. “Like when you hold me down. Like it a lot.” 

He could feel the corners of Lafayette’s mouth turn up in a smile as he continued to bite at his skin, working his way down to his chest. When he reached the top of Alex’s hoodie, he let go of his wrists for a brief moment to yank the article up over his head, stripping him of his shirt right afterward. He began to suck into the skin there, hard enough that Alex knew it would leave purple marks. The thought turned him on even more. He wanted reminders of Lafayette while he was gone. Wanted to be able to look down at his chest and think about those lips and teeth on him, bruising his skin.

Lafayette worked his way down Alex’s body, pausing every now and then to bite and suck a new mark to the surface of his skin. When he was blocked from his progress by Alex’s jeans, he quickly stripped those off as well, tossing them to the floor. “Stay,” he commanded as he let go of Alex’s wrists so he could move lower, focusing on his inner thighs. 

Alex clasped his hands together above his head, not daring to move them. He felt the need for more with Lafayette so close to his cock, yet not touching. The way he was handling him, rough and urgent, had Alex completely desperate. He bucked up as much as he could, Laf’s hands holding down his thighs, trying to get him to notice his dick. Instead, he gave Alex one final kiss on his thigh and sat up, leaning towards the side of the bed. Alex whined at the loss of contact. He felt a shiver run through his body, and he wasn’t sure if it was because of the loss of Lafayette’s body heat or the building arousal in his body. 

Lafayette returned between his legs moments later. Alex, expecting a hand to his cock, was surprised when he felt one lubed finger teasing his hole. He let out a quiet, restrained groan, biting back most of the noise. Laf just probed his finger in a little further, slowly sliding in until he reached the first knuckle, and pulling back out again. “You don’t have to be so quiet, mon chou. No one else is here, remember?”

Truthfully, Alex had forgotten. He figured he’d be lucky at this point, with Laf slowly stretching him open, writhing with pleasure and anticipation, if he could remember his own name. As a second finger entered him, he let out a loud moan. Lafayette set a rhythm with his fingers, pumping in and out of him, scissoring them a bit to stretch him out. Alex squeezed his eyes shut as he felt a finger brush against his prostate. “Fuck,” he cried out, squirming against the mattress. “Right there, babe, right there.”

Lafayette aimed for that same spot, and with each hit Alex was further reduced to a helpless mess. He could feel himself getting close. His body was wound up tight, ready to explode, but he needed more. “Please,” he panted, looking up at Laf. “Please. Need more.” He added a third finger, picking up his pace and drawing more moans from Alex. 

“Laf, need more,” he whined, too keyed up to care about the needy tone of his voice. 

“What do you need?” he asked, crooking his fingers to send sparks. 

“Need you,” he panted. “Need your cock. Please?” He shoved his hips up again, half in desire, half in frustration. 

Lafayette paused, fingers still deep inside Alex. “Are you sure? I need you to be sure.”

“Yes, goddammit. I’m sure. I want your dick to stretch me open. Want to feel it fill my ass. Please.”

Lafayette pulled his fingers out slowly, leaving Alex feeling extremely empty. “How do you want to do it?” Lafayette had his head cocked to the side, biting his lip as he looked at Alex. 

“Wanna ride you. Wanna fuck you with my ass and make that pretty cock feel good.”

Lafayette groaned at the suggestion, coating his dick with a generous amount of lube. He laid back on the bed, propping himself up against the headboard so he had a good view of Alex, climbing on top of him. He pulled down Laf’s pants impatiently, tossing them to the foot of the bed before giving his dick a few quick strokes, making sure he was completely hard and ready. 

Alex lined himself up and then sank down, almost painfully slow. He squeezed his eyes shut as the tip poked at his entrance, the stretch feeling almost impossible at first before the muscles there relaxed into it. As he felt the rim of the head pop inside, Lafayette let out a soft sigh of pleasure below him. Alex paused for a minute, adjusting to the stretch, before sinking a little lower. Every inch was a challenge, but the reward was well worth it. Laf’s dick felt incredible inside of him, stretching him more than he thought possible, filling him up in the most satisfying way. When he was settled all the way down, he gave his hips an experimental roll, giving a pleased grunt as the dick inside of him pushed up against his prostate. “Fuck, Laf. Your cock feels so good. So big.” He rocked back and forth in short thrusts, relishing in the fullness. 

Lafayette was looking up at him patiently, lips parted slightly. As Alex started to moved, picking himself up and dropping back down, he saw the change in Laf’s face. His eyes squeezed shut and his mouth opened wider to let out a low moan. “Alex,” he breathed out. “You’re so tight and warm. You feel so good sliding up and down my cock.” He placed his hands on Alex’s thighs, digging fingers into the skin there. “Faster?”

Wanting nothing more than to chase his own pleasure, Alex did as he was asked. Sped up his pattern, lifting almost all the way off and sinking back down until the flesh of his ass hit Laf’s hips again. As Alex gave him more, Lafayette lifted his hips up to meet him. The extra pressure drove Alex wild with need, and he felt himself start to tip over the edge, his dick still untouched. “Laf, babe, I’m gonna come.”

“Good boy,” Laf groaned, starting to thrust his hips up with more precision. “Come on my dick. Want to feel your tight little ass tense around me.” With a well-timed hit to his prostate, Alex with finishing, clenching and jerking a bit as he came. He felt his own cum hit his stomach, warm and thick. Afterward he fell forward, holding himself up with his arms as Lafayette continued to drive up into him. A few seconds later, he was holding himself in deep as he came, only lifting Alex off of him after he drifted down from his orgasm. 

Alex rolled over onto the sheet next to Laf, staring up at the ceiling and taking a minute to catch his breath. He felt a finger stroke the side of his face and turned so he was looking straight into Lafayette’s eyes. He was smiling, looking completely relaxed and happy. “Mon chou, that felt amazing. Thank you so much.”

He felt himself blush, brought his head forward to bury his face against Laf’s chest to hide his embarrassment. He wasn’t sure why exactly, but he wasn’t used to this level of connection after sex. Wasn’t used to such heartfelt compliments and gratitude. He wasn’t sure how to respond, so he just nuzzled his face into the warm skin there and gave him a small kiss on his pec. 

A couple of minutes later he rolled onto his back, putting a little space between the two of them again. Too warm, too close, too aware of the fact that Lafayette was leaving in the morning. He glanced down at his own body, saw the little purple marks scattered across his skin. He felt his mind start to drift. He thought of loneliness. Abandonment. He knew it wasn’t logical. For now, Lafayette was right next to him. However, he couldn’t shake the feeling and his earlier gloom started settling in again. He sat up, swinging his legs off the side of the bed. 

“I’m going to clean up, okay? Take a shower before bed.”

“Okay. Do you want help? Showers should be empty with everyone gone.” Lafayette gave him a suggestive smirk. 

Alex felt his heart constrict a little. “No, I’m alright. It’d be too crowded anyway. Rather just get myself cleaned up.” He stood up, grabbing his towel. As he approached the door, Laf’s voice drew his attention. 

“Alex?” He gave a searching look, as if he were trying to look into Alex’s mind to find out what was bothering him. “Really, thank you. For that and for everything this semester.”

He turned back towards the door before responding with a quick, “No problem,” leaving a quiet and slightly confused Lafayette behind in his room.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tumblr is ilovefoodandgirls


	10. Chapter 10

A week into break found Alex restless and bored, pacing the kitchen of Hercules’ apartment as his friend spread cream cheese on a bagel. He was usually okay with being alone and keeping himself busy, but for some reason unknown to him, he hadn’t been able to concentrate on anything since classes ended. He tried reading. Started six different books, only getting 20-30 pages in with each one. He tried starting that politics blog Lafayette had brought up, but he couldn’t come up with a topic good enough to write about. 

“Herc,” he whined, pausing as he reached the wall by the door before turning around again. “Can we go out and do something today?”

Hercules sighed, walking to the table with his food and coffee. “I have to go to work. You know, that thing that pays the rent so you can stay here whenever you want?”

“Just do more freelance tailoring stuff from home.”

“Yeah. I have too many bills and not enough customers for that. Sorry.”

“But I’m bored. Just take a sick day.”

“I’m not your babysitter. Call your boyfriend or something.”

Alex made a face as he sat down at the table across from him, a mug of coffee cradled in his hands. 

“What?” Hercules asked, eyebrows raised. 

“That word. Boyfriend.” He said the word with distaste, sipping his coffee as if to wash it out of his mouth. 

“Well, you are dating aren’t you? Doesn’t that make him your boyfriend?”

“I guess? I don’t know. It just sounds so constrictive. I don’t like labels.”

Herc snorted, leaning back in his chair. “That’s not true. You’re fine with labels, you use them all the time. Just the other day you were telling me how important it is that more men call themselves feminists. You’re just being difficult.”

Alex crossed his arms, realizing Hercules was right, but not willing to admit it. “Look, we haven’t really talked about it, and I don’t really want to talk about it. It’s not like we’ve been seeing each other that long.”

Hercules took a final gulp of coffee, finishing off his bagel a minute later. “I don’t have time to be your therapist right now, kid. I’ve really got to go into work.” He carried his plate to the sink then shrugged into his jacket. “Call him. You don’t have to talk about important stuff, even though you should, but you clearly miss him. I’ve never seen you so distracted since I met you.” He pulled the door open, the chill from outside rushing into the entryway. “I’ll see you later.” 

Alex stared at his phone after the door closed, groaning down at it. He debated calling then, his desire to hear Lafayette’s voice competing with his desire to avoid any sort of serious conversation. Instead he pulled open his messages. Read through the last few Laf had sent him. Trivial things about his friends back home. A picture of his fancy Christmas dinner that probably cost more than Hercules’ rent. A selfie of him and some of his friends. He felt the ache of loneliness again and shoved his phone deep into his pocket. He needed a distraction. He grabbed his own winter coat, zipping it up and grabbing a hat and scarf. Maybe if he wandered the city for long enough he would find something interesting to do, or maybe he’d at least tire himself out enough to come back and fall asleep until he wasn’t alone. 

 

Hercules arrived home a little after six, greeted by the sight of Alex sprawled out on the couch, snoring quietly. He rolled his eyes, stepping over to his sleeping houseguest and gently shaking his shoulder. “Alex?” He shook a little harder. “Come on, Hamilton. Time to wake up.” A muffled groan came from the couch cushion below. “Alex. You can’t sleep all the time during your month off. Especially in my living room. Get up.” 

He rolled over slowly, turning his head away from the light. His back ached from sleeping on the couch, and he took a moment to stretch out his body, flexing fingers and toes until he felt a little less asleep. “Hey,” he mumbled, squinting up at Hercules, eyes still too sensitive to stay fully open. 

“Did you call him?” 

Alex’s brow furrowed, mind foggy as he pieced together what Herc was saying with information from his memory. Call him? Call who? The conversation from that morning came to the front of his mind after a moment. “Oh,” he breathed out. “You mean Lafayette?”

“Yeah, who else? Pretty sure he’s all you think about anyway.”

“Stop,” Alex groaned, hiding his face back in the couch cushions. “No, I didn’t. Got busy.”

“Clearly,” Herc said, eyeing his bedhead. 

“I went out into the city. Got some food. Went to Central Park.”

“Ah, I see. Very busy day. Definitely too busy to call your boyfriend.”

In response Alex reached up to smack him on the arm, missing and swinging his hand through the air instead. He glanced up from the couch, noticing Herc had moved back a step to avoid his hit. “Can we go out tonight? Please?”

“You’re not twenty-one.” 

“We don’t have to go to a bar. Let’s just find some cheap show and pregame here. I need to get out and do something, or I’m going to go crazy.”

“Alright fine. I need to unwind anyway. It’s been a long week.”

“You had the first two days off for Christmas,” Alex pointed out. 

“You want to go out or not?”

“Yeah, sorry. Long week. Got it.”

 

A few hours later Alex and Hercules were seated at a two person table in a dark, cramped place in Brooklyn. The band up on the small stage was playing a mix of original songs and covers, loud enough to make conversations feel private. Alex drank a good amount before leaving the apartment, his face a little flushed and his step a little off balance. By the time they reached Brooklyn he was feeling buzzed, but present. Hercules sipped his beer as he glanced up at the stage, finger tapping absentmindedly to the music. 

“Just a couple more years and you won’t have to worry about getting drunk before you go out. Or you could just get a fake.”

“It’s almost my birthday. One more year. And getting a fake seems like a lot of trouble when I can just get drunk at dorm parties or your apartment.”

Hercules hummed in agreement. “That’s true. Do you even have time for dorm parties though? Figured with your busy schedule you’d pretty much just isolate yourself in your room.”

“I’m not a complete hermit,” Alex said, sounding hurt.

Herc laughed, patting him on the arm. “Sorry. It’s not necessarily a bad thing, you just take on a lot of work.”

“Yeah,” Alex agreed. “To be fair, I haven’t been going out as much lately I guess.”

“Because of your new boy.”

Alex made a noncommittal noise as he sipped his water. 

“Well I think you guys are cute together. He may be a little too good for you though,” Herc teased, flashing a smile. 

“Speaking of not being good enough for people, anything going on in your love life?”

“Ouch,” he responded, but he was still smiling. “Not much at the moment. I’ve gone on a couple of dates, but no one’s stuck.”

“There’s girls here. You should go talk to one. But go back to her place if anything happens because I’m not sleeping outside or something.”

“Maybe,” he mused, eyes sweeping the room.

“What about that girl over there?” Alex prompted, motioning to one corner of the room with his head. “She cute.” 

“Yeah,” Herc said slowly, nodding in agreement. “The girl near the end of the bar looks nice too though.” 

Alex glanced back, the girl he was talking about was in tight jeans and a slightly cropped shirt leaning on the bar. “Yeah, I didn’t notice her before. She’s hot. Nice figure.”

Hercules sipped his drink again, considering. 

“Look, if you don’t go talk to her I will,” he said eyeing her with interest. 

Herc raised his eyebrows. “Um, don’t you think your boyfriend might have a problem with that?”

“What?” Alex started, defensive. “We’re seeing each other, but we’re not exclusive.”

“Does he know that?”

“I mean, we haven’t talked about it.” Alex was starting to feel guilty, even though he knew he hadn’t acted on anything. Perhaps it was the way Hercules was looking at him, a mix of concern and well-meaning judgement on his face. “If you haven’t specified you’re exclusive then the other person shouldn’t assume you are. I’m not doing anything wrong, okay?”

Herc sighed deeply, finishing off his beer. “You need to talk to him about it before you do anything.” Alex looked like he was going to argue, so he continued before he could start. “You don’t want to mess things up with Lafayette over a misunderstanding. Communication is a good thing. I don’t get why you’re so afraid of it.”

“I guess so," Alex conceded. "What if he responds badly though? I don’t think I’m ready for the whole monogamy thing. Don’t know if I’ll ever be ready for it to tell you the truth. I like him a lot though, and I don’t want to freak him out.”

“You’ll freak him out more if you don’t talk about it and he finds out another way,” Hercules pointed out. “Just try. He seems nice, and he obviously likes you a lot. If you plan on keeping him around, he’s going to have to know eventually.”

The two of them sat in silence, Alex sipping his water and Herc peeling at the label on his beer bottle. The band had finished their set, and the room around them erupted in applause. The two of them joined in, as much to break the awkward silence as to be polite. When the room returned to its normal level of chatter and noise, Hercules turned toward Alex. “So, can you help me plan out what to say to that girl?”

 

Alex returned to Herc’s apartment alone around midnight. He grabbed a blanket and settled into the couch, his laptop balanced on his stomach as he pulled up Netflix to watch some sitcom. After a little while he pulled out his phone. He considered the time difference, knew Lafayette wouldn’t be awake. He typed out a quick message, “I miss you. Hope you’re having fun with your friends. Call me tomorrow so we can talk?” and tossed the phone onto the coffee table before refocusing his attention on the show. He fell asleep not long after that, the distraction of the TV show lulling him into an uneasy, but continuous sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy St. Patrick's Day! 
> 
> Find me on tumblr at ilovefoodandgirls


	11. Chapter 11

Alex awoke the next morning a few minutes after eight. The first thing he did was glance at his phone. No missed calls. He knew Lafayette was probably being considerate, waiting to call until he knew Alex was awake. He shivered as he pushed the blanket to the side, the temperature in the apartment a reminder of the cold wind and snow outside. He rushed to the bathroom, to the warmth of the shower, sighing with pleasure as the hot water ran over his body. As he let the heat relax his muscles, he thought about classes, writing projects, internships. Anything but Lafayette. He toweled off quickly and threw on sweatpants and a thick hoodie. Made his way back to the couch and checked his phone again. No calls. 

As he waited, he started to think through the possibilities. There was of course the chance that everything would go well. He would tell Lafayette that he wanted an open relationship and Laf would be fine with it. He would tell Alex it was perfectly fine, and they would continue their relationship as it had been going. Then there was the chance that he wouldn’t be okay with it. He would tell Alex he was uncomfortable with it. That he didn’t want to share, and that Alex needed to choose. The worst possibility was that he would be disgusted by the suggestion of seeing other people. He would tell Alex it wasn’t normal and that he should be content with one person. He would leave him. Realize he wasn’t good enough for him. 

He was suddenly overcome with a wave of anxiety and nausea. He needed to move, needed to get up and go somewhere, anywhere. He changed quickly, pulling on jeans and a shirt, and braided his wet hair away from his face. Threw on his jacket, scarf, and hat and stomped down the stairs. Started trying to unpack his feelings. Being with and loving other people should be the easiest and most natural thing in the world. He couldn’t understand why wanting to be with more than one person should complicate it so much, but he knew it did. He knew it wasn’t considered normal. Knew most people would run from the idea of it. Would be afraid of not being enough. Thought that sharing love meant taking away some of it from them instead of multiplying it. 

He wanted to believe Lafayette wouldn’t care about any of it. The two of them had grown so close, and Alex thought that if he had a good understanding of anyone’s thoughts, that person was Laf. People had a habit of surprising him though. Once he finally felt he knew someone, he would mess up. Do or say the wrong thing. Then they would leave. 

He felt goosebumps on his skin as a cold burst of wind blew down the city streets. He glanced around for somewhere warm to duck inside. He noticed a coffee shop about twenty yards ahead of him, a small sign hanging off the doorway with a picture of a steaming mug creaking and swinging violently in the wind. When he opened the door, the heat from the shop stung as it hit his frozen skin. He approached the counter, feeling stiff and awkward in his layers, and ordered an americano and a breakfast sandwich. The girl behind the counter smiled, told him to sit wherever he liked, her cheerfulness a stark contrast to his own mood. As he began pulling off his coat, he felt a buzz from his pocket. He quickly grabbed for it, reading the message on his screen. “Miss you too <3 Busy with friends now, but I can call later. Hope you slept well!” Alex sighed and put his phone down on the table in front of him. The girl from the counter approached with his coffee, setting the mug down in front of him and glancing at his displeased expression. “Everything alright?” 

“I don’t know,” he groaned, placing his head in his hands. Glanced up to see her looking like a deer in the headlights. “Oh, sorry, you meant with the coffee. It looks great. Thanks.” He gave her a forced smile as he felt his face heat up. 

“Okay,” she said, unsure. “Let me know if you need anything.” She darted back to her post behind the counter, avoiding looking in his general direction. 

Alex cursed under his breath, before taking a sip of his coffee. The warmth of the drink made him feel a little better, all things considered. He picked up his phone again, considered replying to the text message, then closed his messages to pull up a website for internship information instead. Focusing on work and school was easier. He understood those things fully and clearly. They were logical. People could always decide he wasn’t good enough, that he had screwed something up, but if he worked hard enough no one could deny that he was worth something. 

 

He made his way back to Herc’s apartment in the early afternoon, his friend sitting on the couch watching some reality TV show. He glanced up and greeted Alex, moving over to make more room. Alex draped his coat over the back of the couch, tossing his hat and scarf onto the coffee table and flopping down to sink into the cushions. “What are you watching?”

“Say Yes to the Dress,” Herc replied, no trace of shame in his voice. 

“Why?”

“Why not? Some of the designs are really cool, and some of the families are really crazy. It’s good TV.”

“Whatever you say,” Alex mumbled. He took out his phone again, rereading Laf’s text. Felt his heart pound as he looked at the little text heart. He wanted everything to be normal between them. Didn’t want to complicate things. He didn’t want to lose heated nights tangled up in each other or the way he felt when Laf stared just a little too long. He sunk back further, bringing his knees up to his chest. 

“What’s wrong with you?” Hercules asked casually.

“What do you mean? Nothing.”

“You call him yet?”

He felt his body tense up at the question. Glanced at his phone again. “No.”

“Didn’t think so.” 

“He said he’d call me today. I’m just waiting on him.”

“Okay,” Herc said, staring forward at the screen. 

“It’s not my fault he’s busy,” Alex stated, annoyance creeping into his voice.

“Never said it was.”

The silence that followed set Alex on edge. His mind flooded with the possibilities of talking with Lafayette again. The uncertainty of the situation making him restless and nervous. After a few moments, he pulled out his laptop, logging into his college account to check the syllabi for his new classes. Figured it couldn’t hurt to get ahead on some stuff. 

 

His phone didn’t start ringing until five that night. He had ordered pizza with Herc, and the two of them were sitting, Hercules on the couch and Alex on the floor with his back up against it, and watching a cheesy horror movie. He felt the phone buzzing in his pocket, could hear the faint vibrations through the material of his jeans, but he didn’t reach for it. Herc leaned forward to grab another slice of pizza, looking down at Alex as he did. “You gonna pick that up?”

Alex shrugged, stared at the screen determinedly. “We’re watching a movie.” A few seconds later the scene froze. He looked behind him to see Hercules, remote in hand, staring at him expectantly. “Just press play. It stopped ringing anyway.”

“Call him back,” he said matter-of-factly. “It’s a shitty horror movie, we can watch it anytime.”

Alex brought his hands up to his face, rubbed small circles on his closed eyes. He lowered them so he could see Herc’s face. He was still just waiting, silently watching him. “I just don’t want to talk to him right now, okay?” His voice was low, quiet. He looked down at the floor. 

“Fine. Can I see what he said to you earlier?”

Without a word, Alex picked up his phone and passed it to him. He realized his mistake a bit too late as he snapped his head around to watch Hercules press callback and bring the phone to his ear. He jumped up, attempting to snatch the phone away, but Herc stood up too, using his other arm to keep Alex a safe distance from his ear. “Hey, Lafayette? Yeah, it’s Hercules, Alex’s friend. He wants to talk to you.”

Herc held the phone out to him and he stared at it for a beat before grabbing it. “Hello?”

“Hi, Alex.” Laf’s voice contained a few different emotions. Excitement, confusion, happiness. “Why did Hercules have your phone?”

“Oh, he’s just being a jerk.” He took a moment to shoot Hercules a glare from where he was standing. “Don’t worry about it. How was your day with your friends?”

“It was great!” He could hear the smile in Lafayette’s voice, and he became suddenly aware of how much he missed seeing it in person. “We spent the day in Paris. We went and saw a show and got some lunch after. We went to this café too, and the macarons were delicious. I should bring some back for you.”

“I doubt they’d be good by the time you got back with them,” Alex pointed out.

“Hmm I suppose you’re right. Maybe I’ll pick some up before I leave on the day of my return.” He paused, and Alex let himself feel happy at the thought of him coming back. Going back to the dorms and feeling his arms wrapped around him, his warmth. “So, did you have something you wanted to talk about, mon cher?”

“Um, not really. Just wanted to talk to you for real.” He could feel Herc’s eyes burning into him, but he refused to meet his gaze. “I’m not sure if you let me go a day without talking to you over the last month, so it just seems really quiet around here now.”

Lafayette laughed, and the sound made Alex’s heart leap in his chest. “I miss your voice too. Even though half the time you’re just grumbling about the cold or your professors, I like listening to you. Speaking of missing you, I was thinking of coming back a few days early and just booking a hotel until I can move back into the dorms. I would love to spend some time with you before you get incredibly busy again. Would that be alright?”

Alex couldn’t contain his smile. “Yeah, that’d be great. I can’t wait to see you. Plus, you know, hotel sex.”

Herc looked up from where he was sitting on the couch. “Gross. I’m right here.”

Alex shushed him as Lafayette continued. “Mhmm. Think of all the things I could do to you in a hotel room. Big bed. Plenty of space. Discreet cleaning service.” He could almost picture the look Laf would be giving him if he were there, and he felt his dick taking interest. 

“Fuck,” Alex groaned. “I miss you so much. 

“I miss you too, mon chou. I’ll look into hotels later tonight.” After a short silence Laf asked, “So, have you been doing anything interesting? Start that blog yet?”

“No, nothing interesting really. Well I went out with Herc last night and saw some band in Brooklyn if that counts. It’s been pretty quiet though with everyone else gone.”

“Well at least you went out last night. That’s good. I’m glad you have Hercules to keep you from being too lonely.”

“Yeah,” Alex agreed, a little halfheartedly. They fell into silence again. 

“Well, if you don’t have anything else to talk about I should be getting back to everyone.”

Alex felt the urge to say something to get him to stay on the call so he could listen to his voice all night, but he really didn’t have anything to talk about besides the one topic he was avoiding. “Okay, sounds good. Talk to you soon?”

“Of course. Goodnight, mon chou.”

“Night, Laf.” He waited to hear the click of the call ending before he put his phone back down on the coffee table. He moved back to his spot on the floor and looked up to meet Herc’s eyes. “Wanna start the movie back up?”

“You were supposed to talk about seeing other people.” 

“Not now, okay?”

“Alex-“

“I’ll talk with him about it eventually. Really, I will. Just not now. Not over the phone. Can we watch the movie now?”

Alex settled into his spot against the couch as Herc pressed play, hugging his knees to his chest. He was aware that Hercules didn’t deserve his irritation, but he couldn’t handle any more questioning of his relationship at the moment. He was worrying enough on his own without any help. He had a couple more weeks until Laf came back, which meant a couple more weeks to shove his feelings down and ignore them. And when he did come back, and the two of them would have to have a serious discussion? Well Alex would deal with that issue when it arrived.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This turned out more angsty than I intended
> 
> Follow me on tumblr at ilovefoodandgirls


	12. Chapter 12

It was the first full week in January when Lafayette flew back to New York. Alex had decided against meeting him at the airport. Told himself he didn’t want to seem too clingy. Didn’t want to rush a relationship that was still new, no matter how quickly he felt he was falling. Despite that, he woke up early to text Laf before he boarded the plane. He knew he should go back to sleep, that the flight would be nine hours, but the almost painful twist of excitement in his stomach made it impossible. He got up, shuffled his way into the kitchen, and started making himself some coffee. As he waited for the pot to brew, he thought about Lafayette. Thought about the way the corners of his eyes crinkled when he smiled, thought about the impossible warmth that radiated off him, thought about the way his hardened muscles felt under his fingers. A wave of loneliness washed over Alex again. He tried to brush it off, knew it was stupid when he would see Lafayette in just hours, but he couldn’t seem to shake it. 

He waited around the rest of the day, intently aware every time his phone buzzed in his pocket. Every text message that wasn’t from Lafayette sent a sting of disappoint through him. Hercules sent him a message at noon, his lunch break, asking if he was there yet. Alex sighed, reminded him that it was a nine hour flight, and no he wasn’t there yet. At 12:30, he started getting ready to leave. Carefully picked out clothes to wear for the day. Decided on one of his better-fitting pairs of jeans and a soft, mint green sweater. Pulled his hair back and away from his face. He quickly shoved all his things back into a large duffle bag, taking more care with his laptop which had a place in his backpack where it was less likely to rattle around. He was ready to go when he got a text from Lafayette a little before one saying that he was leaving the airport and would have the car he rented pick him up from Hercules’ apartment. 

The time it took for Laf to get there felt too long, yet incredibly quick as well. He noticed the car pull up, shiny black and tinted windows, before he got the text from Lafayette telling him he was outside. He pulled his backpack on and slung the other bag over his shoulder before taking the steps as fast as he could, a little off balance with the added weight. As he approached the car, he noticed the driver get out to help him put his bags in the trunk, but before he could hand them over, Lafayette was jumping out of the backseat, headed for Alex with open arms. The force of the hug combined with the uneven weight of his bags had Alex stumbling backwards, but Lafayette’s strong arms held him still. He took a moment to enjoy the feeling of comfort and safety that being held provided, breathed in the dark, spicy scent of his cologne, nearly melted into the warmth of his body. “I missed you.” His voice was quiet, so soft he feared Lafayette may not have heard him, but then he felt lips on his forehead. Laf gave him one final squeeze before pulling away. 

“I missed you too, mon chou.” The way he smiled, all tender and warm, made Alex want nothing more than to stay in his arms all day. Lafayette grabbed the duffle bag from him, refusing help from the driver as he loaded it into the open trunk. Alex slipped the backpack off his shoulders, tucking it on top of the other luggage. Following Lafayette into the backseat, he allowed himself a moment to be amazed by the high-quality leather seats and the overall comfort the car provided. He imagined renting a car like this, especially in the city, cost a small fortune. As they pulled away from the curb, Lafayette pulled him closer, one hand on his back, and drew him into a long, deep kiss. After being so desperate for physical affection over the last few weeks, he felt his brain shut down when he finally received it. His thoughts mushed together, and all he could focus on in that moment was Lafayette. The taste and feel of his lips, his scent, his warmth. It was intoxicating. He had been craving this, and now that he had it all he wanted was more. 

Lafayette was pulling away too quickly, and Alex let out a quiet whine. He heard Laf chuckle affectionately, and as he felt his face heat up he was very grateful that the driver had put up the privacy partition. He glanced up through his eyelashes, taking in all the beautiful details of Lafayette’s face. “I missed you.” He felt the words come out of his mouth, and he wasn’t sure if he was saying them to himself or Lafayette, but it felt like the only full sentence he could form at the moment. 

“You said that already,” Lafayette teased, smiling down at him. He reached out one hand, tucked a stray strand of hair behind Alex’s ear. “Check in isn’t until three. I was thinking we could go get lunch first? I’m starving.”

Alex took a moment to collect himself, still dizzy with desire and his own emotions. “Yeah,” he said slowly, nodding. “Yeah, food would be good. Haven’t eaten much today.” He actually hadn’t eaten anything, but knew telling Lafayette that would only raise unnecessary concern. 

“I really want a burger. I know it’s not a very fancy lunch or anything, but it’s a very American food, and I want to celebrate being back.”

Alex smiled. Thought the need to get ‘fancy’ food was a little silly, but was too thrilled to be back with Lafayette to poke fun at him. “Burgers sound good. French fries too? Get a good mixture of both countries?”

Lafayette groaned. “You know as well as I do that fries are not a French food.”

Alex just shrugged, leaned his head against Laf’s shoulder, and breathed in a deep, contented sigh. As he closed his eyes, he became very aware of how tired he was. Mentally kicked himself for waking up at four and not bothering to rest after that. The heat from Lafayette’s body relaxed him, and soon he was drifting off.

 

He woke not long after, feeling a gentle hand shaking shoulder. “Alex?” He blinked twice, adjusting to the dimmed light inside the car. “Alex?” Looked up and saw Lafayette grinning down at him. “Sleepy, mon cher?” 

Alex pushed himself up so that he was sitting straight again, rubbing the sleep from his eyes. “Sorry,” he said, rolling his neck to try to get rid of any soreness. “Got up early this morning. Didn’t get much sleep.”

“That’s okay. We can sleep at the hotel.”

“I don’t want to sleep at the hotel. There are much better things we can do with that bed.” He glanced up with a look that he hoped was seductive, but a moment later a yawn escaped him. 

“Plenty of time for sleeping and other activities, dear.” He reached down towards Alex’s face and wrapped a strand of hair around his finger. “Your hair got all messed up during your nap. May I fix it for you?”

Alex huffed a sigh, but nodded his approval. Enjoyed the feeling of Lafayette’s fingers in his hair, gently working it into a loose braid. “Very pretty,” he said after he finished, giving an approving nod. Alex rolled his eyes at the wording, but thanked him anyway. 

The car rolled to a stop, and the driver came around to open the door for them. Lafayette paused to discuss details of when they would need to be picked up again, and Alex stretched out on the sidewalk, slightly sore from the awkward position of his short nap. 

For as worried as Lafayette was about lunch not being fancy enough, the place was more upscale than most burger joints. They were seated quickly, and Alex almost laughed looking at all the ridiculous burger creations on the menu. When the waiter came back around, he ordered a simple bacon cheeseburger, and had to bite his tongue to resist making a snarky comment when the waiter asked what type of bread he wanted that on. He wasn’t surprised when Lafayette went in the opposite direction, ordering some complex option stuffed with cheese and topped with avocado and mushrooms. When the waiter was out of earshot he smirked at him. “So much for a simple, American burger.”

Lafayette shrugged, taking a sip of his water. “It sounded like it will taste good. That’s what matters.”

“It sounds like it has too much stuff on it to actually enjoy the taste of the burger.” 

To Alex’s surprise, instead of getting defensive over his food choice, Lafayette smiled warmly at him. “I know you’re trying to tease me, but I’m just so happy to be with you again, mon chou.”

“I’m glad you’re back too,” he said, trying to keep his voice light. 

 

They arrived at the hotel right at three o’clock. As Lafayette went to the front desk to check in, Alex took a few minutes to take in the huge hotel lobby, the chandelier hanging from the middle of the ceiling, the gold detailing on every piece of furniture, the sparkling marble floors. Lafayette walked back to him with two room keys, handing their bags over to one of the hotel employees. As they started walking towards the elevators, Alex couldn’t stop the question from falling out of his mouth. “So, I knew you were rich, but like, how rich exactly? Because I’d imagine this is a pretty fucking expensive hotel to stay in for a week. Sorry if this is a weird thing to ask, but like, damn. I’m just a little in shock right now.” 

Laf gave a light breath of laughter, sounding almost nervous. “Um, well I am a Marquis. I come from a long line of nobility in France, and when my parents died the money they had was all inherited by me. So, very rich I guess.” He was talking fast. It almost sounded rehearsed. 

Alex chewed his lip for a moment, soaking in that new bit of information. He was surprised. Lafayette was normally an open book with him. “You don’t like talking about it do you?” 

Laf let out a sigh of relief, shaking his head. “It’s… uncomfortable? I just want people to treat me normal, and that’s difficult when they know about my family history.”

“Alright. I won’t pretend I can relate to that, but it’s not something you have to be ashamed of either. Like, yeah I’m jealous, but it’s not like you asked to be richer than everybody else.” 

Their conversation was cut short as the elevator dinged and opened, letting them out onto the correct floor. They found their room quickly, Lafayette swiping the card to open the door, and found their bags already waiting for them. Alex glanced around the room, his eyes immediately drawn to the oversized bed. “God, this thing is huge!” He let himself fall forward onto the duvet, feeling like he was on top of a giant marshmallow rather than a mattress. “I want to live here.”

“In the hotel?”

“On this bed specifically.”

Lafayette crawled across the mattress to lie next to him, tucking one arm around him to pull him a little closer. Alex rolled over so he was on his back, letting his head rest against Laf’s chest. His eyes drifted shut as he listened to the steady beat of his heart. “I missed you,” he mumbled, his lips barely moving.

“I know you did. I missed you too.”

He felt himself smile as Lafayette gave him a brief squeeze. He half-heartedly tried to keep himself awake, told himself that he needed to spend time with Laf now that he was back, but the comfort mixed with his tiredness pulled him down into a deep and contented sleep. All the worries were replaced in his mind with thoughts of Lafayette, and for the moment, that was enough.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, first off, sorry for the long wait on this. I've been having a very stressful time with work lately, and then was out of town for a few days. 
> 
> Second, because of personal reasons, the next couple of chapters are probably going to take a while to come out. I'm aiming for one a week, but I can't make any promises. 
> 
> Seriously, thank you so much to everyone who's reading and commenting. It means the world to me. <3 
> 
> Come check me out on tumblr at ilovefoodandgirls


	13. Chapter 13

When Alex awoke, he noticed two things. The first was that he was no longer on Hercules’ couch, and the second was that there was a weight on top of his chest. He slowly opened his eyes, squinting as he glanced around. Through the fog in his mind, he remembered that morning. Remembered getting picked up, going out to lunch, and arriving at the hotel. He looked down at his chest, saw one long arm draped over him. He followed it to the side and felt a smile tug at the corner of his lips. Lafayette was still asleep, his chest rising and falling deeply, his lips just barely parted as he breathed in and out. He managed to carefully wriggle his way off the bed without waking up the other man. 

He quietly moved to the couch near the window, staring out at the city below them. The city looked different from high up. When you were down on the streets it was easy to get lost up in the crowds of people, wandering around without really knowing where you were going. From a distance it looked so organized though. Tall buildings speckled a well-thought-out grid of roads. Central Park, which could seem endless when you were walking its paths, was no more than a large patch of green in a mass of grey and silver. The people were no more than tiny dots, like insects, moving from point A to point B with a sense of purpose. All of the imperfections, litter, crimes, were blurred away from this height. He liked the city from up here better. It was simple. It made more sense. 

As he looked back over at the bed, at his sleeping boyfriend, and wished he could remove himself from his own life. He wanted to look down at his own problems from above, seeing only the parts that made perfect sense. He craved a logical solution, while simultaneously knowing that it was useless trying to use logic when it came to relationships. He had to talk to Lafayette, and he had no way to know how he would react. He could guess, could assume based on what he did know about Laf, but he had no way of knowing for sure and that terrified him. He sighed, bringing a hand up to rest his forehead against. He wasn’t sure how long he sat there, lost in his own thoughts with his face inches from the glass, but he was finally broken out of his introspection when the weight of another body softly settled into the couch next to him. 

Lafayette was watching him quietly, his expression soft. When Alex finally turned around and met his eyes, the only word he could utter was, “Hey.” His lips felt dry after not talking for so long, and he darted his tongue out to lick across them. 

Laf considered him for a moment, reached out a hand to rest against his thigh, thumb idly rubbing small circles over his jeans. “Everything okay?”

Alex swallowed, feeling the words thicken in his throat. “Yeah, I guess.” He paused, another stretch of silence settling over them. It was heavy with the weight of his own expectations. He knew he had to say something, but it was so damn hard to find the right words and force them out. Despite his fears, the moment felt right, so he made himself talk. He had to forget about saying the right words, because saying something, anything, was more important. “I wanted to talk to you about something. And I’m not sure how you’re going to react, which is why I didn’t talk to you about it sooner.”

Lafayette didn’t say anything, probably didn’t want to interrupt him, but his expression said to go on. “I’m not very good at serious relationships. I get things wrong a lot. Things always seem to end badly, and it’s usually my fault.” He took a deep breath, steadying his voice. “But I like you a lot. More than I can ever remember liking anyone. I’ve felt alone for so long, even when I was dating people, and with you I finally feel like I have a family again.” Lafayette was smiling down at him, his eyes watery. He forced himself to keep talking, the words coming out faster than he meant them to. “So I don’t want you to take this as me not thinking you’re enough. You mean so much to me, and I wouldn’t want you to ever think you didn’t. But, even though you mean so much to me, I want to see other people too.”

Lafayette raised his eyebrows in surprise before a look of confusion flashed over his face. “So you don’t want to be my boyfriend?” 

“No,” Alex said quickly, fearing he had already messed everything up. “I mean, yes I do. I want to be your boyfriend, but I also want to keep dating other people. Or at least keep the option open. It’s not like I’m seeing someone else right now or anything.” His voice trailed off at the end, and he stared down at his own lap, his fingers fidgeting in his fists. He briefly glanced up to check Lafayette’s expression and was surprised by what he saw there. It wasn’t disgust or anger. He looked thoughtful, like he was considering Alex’s words carefully. 

“So, would the other people be just a sexual relationship?” 

“Not necessarily. I mean, I might hook up with people, but I might date some of them too.”

“I see. And you’d be okay if I had other relationships as well?”

That took Alex by surprise. He hadn’t expected Lafayette to want the same things he did, but he figured if he was open to trying it himself it was probably a good sign. “Yeah, of course. You know, if that’s what you want.”

He hummed, seemingly lost in thought. Alex waited with bated breath, unable to tear his gaze from Lafayette’s face. After a few torturous minutes, he finally began to speak slowly. “This all sounds fine to me. It’s not conventional, but honestly I’ve never been very into convention anyway. As long as I have you in my life, I’m happy, Alex.” Laf smiled, and the warmth of it comforted him, allowing him to finally take a deep breath. 

“I’m happy to have you too,” he sighed in relief. “Really, truly, I am. I know I’m not very good at telling you all the time or anything, but you make my life better, and I love-” he cut himself off, panicking a bit at what almost slipped out. “Um, how much you care about me.”

“Alex?” Lafayette asked, gazing at him with a soft expression. 

“Yeah?” 

“Thank you for telling me. I love you.”

“Yeah.” Alex swallowed hard. “I love you too, Lafayette.”

Laf gave him a teasing smile, sensing his discomfort. “How much?”

“What?”

“How much do you love me?”

In lieu of a response, Alex leaned forward, winding a hand through the curls at the back of Lafayette’s head and pulling him into a hard, deep kiss. He let his tongue poke into his mouth with a roughness, intent to thoroughly prove how much he loved him with his mouth alone. He felt Lafayette lean into it, returning his actions with enthusiasm. He brought his other hand to Laf’s side, dragging his fingers along the skin underneath his shirt, pleased with himself when Lafayette moaned into the kiss, reaching out to pull him in closer. Alex took that as an invitation to pull Laf’s shirt over his head, exposing dark skin pulled taut over beautifully sculpted muscles. 

When they finally broke apart, both panting, Lafayette was the first to speak. “Bed?” he questioned between breaths. Alex let himself be pulled up and dragged over to the bed, falling on top of his boyfriend without much grace. He took advantage of the new position by leaving a trail of kisses from his neck down to his stomach, biting and sucking at Lafayette’s abs. Alex brought his hands down to his thighs, kneading the skin there through his jeans and earning a low moan. Encouraged and impatient, he worked quickly to strip Laf of his jeans as well. He allowed himself a moment to appreciate his boyfriend’s body, the way he looked stretched out on the bed, the outline of his cock stretching his boxer briefs tight. 

Lafayette took advantage of Alex’s pause, sitting up and pulling him back into a kiss. It was rough and meaningful. The kind of kiss that promised more was soon to come. Laf had placed one hand on Alex’s ass, his fingers massaging and grabbing. He pulled his mouth away just an inch. “Take off your clothes.” It wasn’t a question. Alex rushed to obey, first tugging his shirt over his head and then maneuvering his body until he could pull his jeans off, throwing them to the side. “Much better,” Lafayette growled, digging his nails into the bare skin of his lower back. 

“Fuck,” Alex breathed, throwing his head back. 

“Too much?” Lafayette questioned, lightening his touch. 

“No, no,” Alex corrected him quickly. “Just feels good. Really damn good.”

Lafayette smiled devilishly at that, dragging his nails up and down his back. When his fingers made their way back down towards his ass, he plucked at the waistband of his underwear. “I thought I told you to take off your clothes,” he whispered in Alex’s ear. “You missed a piece.” 

“Sorry,” he responded, biting his lower lip and glancing up. 

Lafayette pushed him down onto the bed, his face hovering inches above Alex’s cock. “You’re not very good at following directions,” he teased, licking his lips. The heat from his breath was ghosting over Alex. He itched with excitement, just waiting for the feeling of those lips wrapped around his dick. 

“Yeah? What’re you going to do about that?” 

“I think I will have to teach you how to listen. Now stay.” With that he was standing up, walking over to his luggage. Alex craned his neck, trying to get a view of what he was doing, but Lafayette’s back was to him. All he could hear was the zipper of his suitcase, then the items inside shuffling around. When he turned back towards the bed, he had a soft looking blindfold in his hand. 

“Lift your head up.” Alex was eager to comply, letting Lafayette buckle it behind him. The material was thick, and the room around him went dark. He let his eyes close, very aware of Lafayette’s body still leaning over him. “Okay, now put your head down.” Alex let his head fall back against the mattress, listening to Lafayette’s breathing and focusing on the thudding of his own pulse. He could feel him sit back, his weight pulling the mattress down just slightly. “Do you know the color system?”

Alex nodded, taking a deep breath. “Yeah. Red is stop, green means everything’s good, and yellow means to pause and check in.”

“Okay good. And you will call red if you don’t like something I’m doing?”

“Yeah of course.”

“And right now? The blindfold?” 

“Green,” he assured him. “Very green. Kind of curious where it came from, but no complaints.”

“Good.” Alex felt a hand on the side of his face, and then winding into his hair. “Now open your mouth.” As soon as he did, he felt Lafayette’s cock pressed up against his lips. He opened wider, and Laf took the opportunity to shove himself in deep, nearly brushing the back of his throat. Alex relaxed his mouth, using his tongue to spur Lafayette on. He let out a moan around his dick, knowing from experience how good the vibrations would feel. Laf groaned in pleasure, pushing Alex to take him in deeper. “You feel so good, mon chou. You look good too, with my dick stuffed in your mouth.” Alex felt his cheeks flush as he sucked hard. 

Then he felt a stilling hand grip his hair tightly, stopping him from continuing. “That’s enough for now. Want you to make my cock feel good in other ways too.” As Lafayette pulled himself out, Alex took a moment to catch his breath, his chest rising and falling dramatically. He was aware of Lafayette getting up, the noise of the duvet ruffling giving him away. As his breathing returned to normal, his heart continued to throb at a quick pace. He focused on the beats as he waited for Lafayette to return, uncomfortably aware of how hard his own dick was. 

Then there was a long, lubed finger, slowly circling his entrance. His back arched and he tried to push into the contact, but another hand came to his hip, pushing him back down. “Stay still.” As he slid one finger in, Alex couldn’t help the way his hips bucked up. “I said hold still. And if you want to come, I suggest you listen.” Alex whined, but willed himself to keep his hips pressed down into the mattress. Lafayette opened him slowly, taking his time to stretch him and work his way up to three fingers. Alex was growing desperate under him, squirming and panting with the need for a more fulfilling touch. 

“Please,” he whined, embarrassed by how quickly he was falling apart. “Please give me your cock.” 

“That what you want?” Lafayette crooked his fingers, finally hitting his prostate. Alex sucked in a harsh breath as body lit up. “Want my cock in that tight little ass of yours?”

“God yes. Need your dick. Please.”

Lafayette pulled his fingers out, and Alex was torn between wanting them back inside of him, filling him up, and wanting Laf to hurry up and shove his cock in. His clean hand was trailing along his side, making Alex shiver. “Get up, my love. All fours.”

Alex did as best as he could without being able to see, rolling over and crawling into position. He felt Lafayette nudge his ass forward, and he scooted up the bed a little more. “There we go. Perfect.” One hand had gone down to ass again, kneading the flesh. “You look so pretty like this, Alexander. So eager to be pounded by my dick.” He gave him a playful smack before coating himself in lube and lining up. Alex felt his own dick twitch in anticipation and he pressed back, craving the feeling of being filled. He heard Lafayette laugh lightly at the display, but he couldn’t find it in himself to care as he began pushing in. Even with the thorough prep, Lafayette’s dick was big enough that the initial stretch was bordering on uncomfortable. He groaned as the head popped in, his face falling forward as he leaned down on his forearms. He felt Laf still his own movements for a moment. “Alex? Color?”

“Green. Fuck. Just keep going please.”

He seemed to be satisfied with that answer as he inched himself in further until he was fully seated inside. Alex felt so open, every part of his body just screaming for movement, for more stimulation. He didn’t have to wait long before Lafayette began thrusting, slow at first, but eventually picking up speed. He was growing close, the pressure in his dick building. “More,” he begged, pushing himself back on the dick inside of him as much as he could. Lafayette practically growled, pounding into him with a renewed energy. Within a matter of minutes, Alex was spilling onto the sheets below him, lost in his own pleasure as Lafayette came inside of him with a low groan. 

Soon after he felt strong hands behind him pulling off the blindfold. He blinked his eyes open, readjusting to the light. He let himself fall forward onto the mattress, leaning to the side a bit to avoid the mess he made. He felt Lafayette fall into place behind him, draping one arm over his side and tugging him closer. 

“Shit,” Alex breathed out, his voice still shaky. “That was good.”

Lafayette hummed in agreement, resting his face against Alex’s shoulder. “Very good.” A comfortable silence surrounded the two of them as they lay on the bed together, enjoying the afterglow. After a little while, Lafayette leaned down to kiss Alex’s collarbone, whispering, “I love you,” into his skin. 

“I love you, too.” The words flowed out easier now, and for the first time Alex found himself believing that maybe he didn’t have to be so afraid of falling headfirst and letting his emotions guide him. After all, if falling felt this good, maybe any pain that came with it would be worth it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always, thanks for reading and I love comments. I'll be at work all night, and I'll really appreciate having some new comments to read when I get back. <3
> 
> I'm on tumblr at ilovefoodandgirls so come talk to me there too. 
> 
> <3 <3 <3


	14. Chapter 14

The rest of the week passed pleasantly for the two of them. Without the interruption of class or friends, they were able to spend time wrapped up in each other, exploring hidden spots in the city and enjoying nights tangled up in the bedsheets at the hotel. Alex wasn’t expecting to do much for his birthday. Throughout his teen years he felt lucky if his foster parents decided to get him a cake, so he never expected much. Learned not to hope for anything too extravagant. To his surprise however, Lafayette was fully prepared to spoil him. 

He usually woke up first. Had a habit of getting up early to get work done. That morning however, he was confused when he rolled over and Lafayette’s large, warm body was nowhere to be seen. He glanced around the room, pondering where he could have gone off to, and eventually shrugged it off. He pulled himself to his feet and shuffled off to the bathroom, carefully inserting his contacts and giving himself a once over in the floor length mirror before hopping in the shower. After about five minutes he heard the click of the door opening and the sound of heavy footsteps. He hurried to finish rinsing out his hair, squeezing his eyes shut against the soapy water that fell over his face. As he stepped out of the shower he felt goosebumps rise on his arms, the colder air making him shiver. He quickly toweled off his hair, wrapping a second towel around his waist and wishing his own were as soft as the ones the hotel provided. Felt a sting of jealousy over the luxuries that he knew he couldn’t afford. Willed himself to just be happy that he was here now with Lafayette. 

As he stepped out of the bathroom he was hit with another wave of cold air. “Can you turn up the heat? I hate winter in the city.”

“Of course, mon chou.” Lafayette’s voice was light and happy, and Alex thought he noted nervous excitement in his tone. He rounded the corner into the main room and felt his mouth drop open slightly in surprise. Breakfast was laid out on the bed for him. A tray with pancakes, eggs, bacon, fruit, and coffee. Next to this was a small box, wrapped in shiny gold paper and tied up with a blue ribbon. A small card sat next to it, propped open so it would stand upright on the bed. 

“What’s all this?” He felt his voice almost crack, his emotions pushing their way forward. 

“Happy birthday, my love!” Lafayette’s smile was so bright and wide Alex was surprised it didn’t blind him. He approached the bed slowly, feeling tears prick the corners of his eyes and blinking them back. He eyed the box, taking in the careful wrapping, the handmade card next to it with beautiful lettering. He couldn’t bring himself to unwrap the gift. Just stood there taking it all in. 

“Alex? Mon cher? Are you alright?”

He swallowed a few times, trying to compose himself. “Yeah I’m fine. Just… you didn’t have to do all this.”

A flash of confusion crossed Lafayette’s face. “Of course I didn’t have to. I did it because I wanted to make you feel special on your birthday. That’s what birthdays are for, no?”

Alex gave him a small smile. “Yeah. You’re right. Thank you.” He looked up at Lafayette, his heart as full as a balloon, about to pop. 

After a few seconds, Lafayette pushed him towards the gift. “Go on,” he insisted, his eyes sparkling. “Open it!” 

Alex laughed lightly and reached for the card, his eyes scanning the words quickly, lingering on the “Love, Lafayette” at the end. He let out a small sigh of happiness, setting it down gently on the blanket. He spent a few frustrated seconds pulling at the ribbon before holding it out to Laf with a noise of distress. “I don’t know how you tied this thing, but you need to get it off.” He obliged, pulling it in just the right way so that it slid off the packaging and handed the box back to Alex. He tore at the wrapping paper eagerly, revealing a small, leather box. He glanced up at Lafayette, who was staring back at him excitedly. He made a little “go on” gesture, and Alex popped the box open. 

Inside was a watch, simple but beautiful, with a dark brown leather band. The face was rimmed in shiny gold with matching roman numerals and hands. He figured it was expensive, it had an old-school classy look to it without being too ostentatious. Something Alex could actually wear without feeling out of place paired with the rest of his clothes. He was transfixed, simply staring at the way the light hit it, when Lafayette cleared his throat. He looked up, seeing his boyfriend looking almost nervous. “Do you like it? I could probably exchange it for something else if you’d prefer…” 

Alex cut him off with a smile. “It’s perfect. Gorgeous.” He leaned over to give him a quick kiss. “Thank you.”

Lafayette smiled back, relief washing over his features. “Look at the back of it.” 

Alex took it out of the box and flipped it over in the palm of his hand. It was engraved in delicate looking French. I treasure every second with you. He felt his heart swell with affection, his eyes starting to water again. He couldn’t find words to express what he felt, so instead he just closed the distance between the two of them, wrapping his arms around Lafayette and craning his neck up to meet his lips in a kiss. He couldn’t believe he had been so worried over the last month. Didn’t know how he ever could have thought Lafayette wouldn’t accept every part of him. When they broke apart he rested his head against his boyfriend’s chest for a minute, appreciating his warmth and comfort. Appreciating the feeling of knowing he was wanted. “Thank you,” he finally breathed out, barely more than a whisper. “I love it.”

Lafayette held him for a little bit, sensing he was emotional. When they finally broke apart, it was Alex who stepped back. He looked up for a few beats, smiling at his boyfriend, feeling so incredibly lucky. Laf smiled back at him, the corners of his eyes crinkled, before breaking the moment. “You need to eat breakfast before it gets cold, mon cher.”

 

Lafayette had the day all planned out for them. Alex grumped at first, insisting it was too cold to go outside, but after some prodding he gave in, bundled up, and left the hotel hand in hand with his boyfriend. He allowed himself to be lead to the subway, and soon enough was sitting next to Lafayette, so close their thighs were touching on the crowded car. He leaned over slightly, letting his head rest against Laf’s shoulder, his eyes closed as they sat in silence. He couldn’t help but think how nice this felt, how right it felt, to be close to him like this. He could feel Lafayette’s chest gently rise and fall, could smell his cologne, could hear the almost silent sound of his breathing. Too soon, he was being pulled up and led out of the subway car, back onto the busy streets of the city. 

They spent the day going from one destination to the next. Ice skating, lunch and coffee, a matinee, and finishing with dinner and dessert at an Italian restaurant. As the server brought out two very large slices of chocolate cake, Alex felt relieved that Lafayette hadn’t asked anyone to sing the “Happy Birthday” song. He took a bite, moaning as the flavor melted into his mouth, and he glanced up to see Lafayette looking at him with a smirk on his face. He smiled back as he felt a foot nudge his leg under the table, rubbing against his pant leg. “This cake is delicious,” he said in between bites. “Why don’t people eat cake more? Like, why is it a special occasion thing?”

“Probably because it’s not healthy.”

“It’s totally worth it though.”

Lafayette just shook his head. Figured he could give in considering it was Alex’s birthday. As they finished their final bites of cake, their server came over with the check and wished them a good evening. As Laf glanced at the bill and pulled some money out of his wallet to pay, he looked over at Alex and smiled again. “I hope you’re ready for part two of your birthday present.” 

He glanced down at the expensive watch sitting on his wrist, lightly brushing his fingers over the leather. “Part two? You’ve already done so much today, you didn’t have to get me anything else.”

“It’s more of an activity than a gift,” he clarified, licking his lips and giving Alex a pointed look. He reached under the small table, tracing long fingers along Alex’s inner thigh. Alex bit his lip to keep himself from making any inappropriate noises and felt his body take interest immediately. 

“I think I am very ready for part two then. So ready, in fact, that I’m not sure I can make it back to the hotel.”

Lafayette laughed, drawing his hand back and pushing his chair out from the table. “We will get a cab. I hope you can exercise a small amount of patience.” Alex stood as well, pulling on his jacket and grabbing Laf’s hand as they made their way outside. He shivered from both the cold breeze and the anticipation as his boyfriend hailed a taxi. He smiled as they waited, realizing that this birthday had to be better than all his previous ones put together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all for being patient with me and waiting so long for this chapter! 
> 
> As always, I'm on tumblr @ilovefoodandgirls


	15. Chapter 15

Alex waited eagerly next to Lafayette in the lobby, practically vibrating with excitement as a set of elevator doors slid open. He quickly noted that the elevator was empty, and as soon as the doors closed he took the opportunity to press his body up against Lafayette’s. A hand reached down and landed firmly on his ass, giving him a rough squeeze as Alex leaned up to catch Laf’s lips in a kiss. He responded enthusiastically, cupping the back of Alex’s head with his other hand and pulling him in deeper. 

They heard a ding as the doors slid open, and the two of them broke apart quickly. Lafayette took Alex’s hand, practically dragging him down the hallway to their room. He fumbled with the keycard for a moment before they heard the click of the lock, and then he was pulling Alex inside, pushing him onto the bed. 

In only a few seconds, Alex was pinned down underneath Lafayette. His boyfriend’s hands were tangled in his hair, pulling his face up to smash their lips together. He felt Lafayette’s tongue trace the spot where his lips met and opened his mouth eagerly, his own tongue meeting Lafayette’s and exploring his mouth with rushed desire. He seemed to lose track of time as he laid there on the bed under his boyfriend, the only thing that existed were their two mouths and the swell of lust that kept him biting and sucking at those lips, hungry for more but too lost in the moment to chase after it. It could have been hours or just minutes when Lafayette pulled away, only an inch, his breathing heavy and a mischievous smile on his face. Alex could feel the heat in his cheeks from the closeness and the energy of it all. He bit his bottom lip, swollen from the kiss, and tried to lift his face back to Lafayette’s. 

He laughed gently, a contrast to the roughness of the kiss, and pulled himself up so he was kneeling above Alex. “Non, mon chou. Do you want to simply kiss all night?” 

Alex let out a low noise of disappointment, but shook his head. It was no use arguing with Laf when he got in this mood, and he figured the easier he gave in, the quicker the reward. There’d be plenty of time for fighting back later, for now his need for pleasure was stronger than his stubbornness. 

Lafayette stepped off the bed, standing next to it and looking down at him. Alex started to sit up, but was halted by a hand on his chest, pushing him back down. “Stay. Just need to get something.” He moved over to his suitcase and emerged a minute later with a gift bag. He held it out to Alex wordlessly, his eyes full of nervous excitement. 

Alex eyed the bag suspiciously, leaning onto his side to take it in his hands. “I thought you said no more presents.”

“I did, but I wanted this to be a surprise. I’m hoping you will like them, but if not we don’t have to use them.”

His curiosity getting the better of him, he pulled the shiny tissue paper out of the bag, slowly lifting out its contents. It was a set of cuffs, ankle and wrist, in black leather that matched the gag Lafayette had given him. He raised his eyebrows, the glint in his eyes betraying his interest. “Is this a gift for you, or me?” 

Lafayette laughed again, the sound almost too innocent for the situation, “I will definitely enjoy using them on you, but if your reaction to the gag is any indication, I am thinking you will find this pleasurable as well.” His tone was raised up at the end, almost as if it were a question, and Alex found himself nodding his head very slightly. 

“Yeah,” he admitted. “Can’t lie, I’m pretty excited to try them out.” He licked his lips as Lafayette sat back down at the edge of the bed. “You cuffing me so I can’t move. Helpless to whatever you want to do to me. Wherever you want to touch me.” He let out a soft moan as his head fell back. 

Lafayette hummed a low note of agreement, picking one of the wrist cuffs up and examining it. “Yes exactly. I want to make you feel good on your birthday, and I don’t want you to trying to take control of the situation. I want you to just let me touch you, and fuck you, without interruption. Understood?”

“Yessir,” Alex responded in a sarcastic tone. Laf gave him a warning look, and he bit his tongue to avoid any more smartass remarks. 

“Well, what are you waiting for?” Lafayette asked him with a note of impatience. When Alex gave him a confused look, he huffed in annoyance. “How am I going to cuff you when you are still fully clothed? That will not do at all. Go on and strip for me.” Alex rushed to obey, taking off his clothes with haste and dropping them unceremoniously in a pile next to the bed. 

Lafayette took the cuffs one at a time, circling both his wrists, and then his ankles. “Hands and knees,” he commanded, taking a moment to consider, and then pushing him down until his shoulders were on the bed. Alex couldn’t see from his position, but he felt Laf grab one wrist, pulling it down towards his leg, and clipping it to the ankle cuff there. He repeated the process on his other side. Alex found himself not fully immobilized, but not able to go anywhere for sure. What he was most focused on though was how vulnerable and open he was. His ass forced up by his position, legs spread, cock hanging down between them. 

“Color check?” 

“Green. Please just touch me. Need you to touch my cock. Or my ass. Just please touch me.”

“You are very impatient. We’re just getting started. I wouldn’t want to rush any of this. It would be less fun that way, no?”

In response, Alex just gave a frustrated groan into the mattress. Lafayette was standing behind him at the end of the bed. He couldn’t see him, but he could place his voice, heard small movements, the jingling of his belt, the zip of his pants. His mouth watered at the thought. Suddenly he felt fingers lightly brush over the skin of his thighs, trailing up towards his ass. Out of habit, he turned his face into the duvet to muffle the low moan that escaped him. 

“None of that. You don’t have to quiet yourself here, mon cher, I want to hear your noises.”

“Fuck Laf, just fuck me, please,” he growled. 

“How many times must I tell you, you are too impatient?” He moved his hands again, moving to caress Alex’s arms, still flush with the bed. Then he moved to his back, traced small patterns there, appreciating the dip before the curve of Alex’s ass. “You’re beautiful like this, you know. Desperate for someone to touch you. I wish I could keep you like this all the time. So ready and willing for me.”

“Fuck,” he gasped. “Please Laf, please.”

“You want me to touch you here?” he teased, reaching one hand around to run fingers down the length of his cock. 

Alex jerked at the contact, trying to lean into it. “Fuck yes, feels good.” 

Ignoring Alex, Laf pulled his hand away, laying it instead on his ass. “What about here?” He brought one dry finger down, toying with his opening. Alex let out a groan, louder than before, and nodded his head vigorously. “You like when I play with your ass? Tell me.”

“Yes, Laf, I love when you touch my ass. Just put your fingers in me already.”

Instead, he felt Lafayette kneeling on the bed behind him. His only warning was the warmth of Laf’s breath as he parted his cheeks, before feeling his tongue circling. “Fuck, Laf. Oh my god, fuck, that’s good.” He let out a gasp of pleasure as he felt Lafayette’s tongue push inside, warm and wet as he wiggled it around. They stayed like that for a while, Alex moaning into the bed and Laf licking and thrusting into his hole with his tongue. Alex tried to use what little leverage he had to push himself back onto Lafayette’s face, but he simply grabbed onto his thighs and held him in place. Eventually he felt Laf get up off mattress, the cool air on his exposed backside a stark contrast to the warmth of his boyfriend’s mouth. 

“You gonna fuck me yet, or are you gonna keep me waiting all night?” He tried to keep his tone light, playful. 

“While making you wait all night sounds appealing, I am looking forward to fucking that nice ass of yours. However, if you want this cock, want me inside of you, I’m going to need you to ask nicely.”

Alex couldn’t see his face, but he could practically hear the smirk in his voice. He had to admit, the way Laf was talking to him, the way he had taken control, gave off that glow of quiet power, was doing things to him. His cock was hard, leaking onto the sheets below him, and his whole body felt taught with anticipation. He couldn’t give in though, not quite yet. He never surrendered to anyone quite that easily, even if they were only playing roles right now. 

“Stop being a fucking jerk,” he grunted, “and just fuck me already.”

Lafayette breathed out a sigh, and Alex noted the exaggeration in its length. “If you can’t ask nicely, then perhaps you don’t want me to fuck you nicely either.” 

Alex froze for a moment, wondering what exactly he meant by that. Momentarily distracted, he tensed as he felt one lubed finger abruptly slip into his hole. “Fuck,” he moaned, allowing himself to relax into it. 

Sensing his surprise, Lafayette paused. With the finger still inside, he leaned over a bit to make sure Alex could hear him. “Alex? Color?”

“So green. Keep going. Want your dick.”

With that reassurance, he worked a second finger in, pumping in and out a few times before scissoring them apart, stretching him out. Alex moaned, noticing how it burned a little being opened so quickly. He knew if they kept going at this pace he wouldn’t be ready for Laf’s size to fit comfortably. He realized he didn’t care. The thought went straight to his dick, how nice it would feel to be fucked open by Laf’s cock. How nice it would feel to hurt a little. 

“Please, Lafayette, need your cock.”

“Now? You only have two fingers.”

“You said-” he was cut off by a groan as Laf’s fingers brushed against his prostate. “That you weren’t going to fuck me nicely. Well stop fucking around then and put your cock in me.” 

All at once the fingers inside of him were gone. He bit his lip to stop the whine in his throat from escaping. Too eager to allow himself to say or do anything that might stop his boyfriend from continuing. 

He felt the tip of Lafayette’s cock, slicked with lube, push against his entrance. His breath caught in his throat as he waited for the stretch before he realized that Laf wasn’t moving yet. He was just kneeling there, waiting. When he tried his best to push back, he was met with a hand on his ass, digging into the meat of it. “You have been very naughty tonight, Alexander. Not asking me nicely when you wanted me to make you feel good. Calling me names. You’ve been acting like a real brat, you know this?”

Alex didn’t say anything. Just gritted his teeth and leaned into the contact. 

He felt the rush of air before the hit made contact. Lafayette’s other hand landed on his cheek with a loud slap, the sting of it rushing through his body. He could feel the flush on his face deepen, desperate for relief. “I asked you a question. I expect an answer.”

“Fine. I’ve been a brat. Happy now?” He would have sounded more convincing if his tone of casual annoyance hadn’t shifted to something much more breathless and needy after the first couple of words.

“It’s a start.” He felt Lafayette start to lean forward, stretching his ass open slowly, centimeters at a time, around his dick. He paused again, the head not fully inside yet. “You want my cock? Tell me why I should give it to you.” 

The gears in Alex’s brain went to work immediately, trying to figure out the best thing to say to get what he wanted. “Please,” he started. “I need you, Laf. Need your dick more than I need air. More than I need the blood pulsing through my veins. I’ll die if I don’t feel you inside of me, filling me up so good. Need you more than anything. Please, please I’ll do anything.” 

“That was pretty good, but I expect better next time. You are so good with words Alexander, I expected you would be able to beg properly.” With that he pushed in all at once. The sudden stretch caught Alex off guard, and he let out a long, low whine, his body caught somewhere between pain and arousal. He moaned as Laf pulled out and then pushed back in with a force that he wasn’t used to. The sting of it only encouraged him to be more vocal, moan louder, wordless pleas for more. He felt Laf’s fingers digging into his hips, holding him closer as he picked up the pace. 

“Fuck,” he groaned, squeezing his eyes shut as his boyfriend’s dick finally hit his prostate. Lafayette was deep inside of him, splitting his ass open with each thrust. Alex could feel that some of his normal composure was slipping. Laf’s breath was coming in heavy, short grunts as he plowed into him. He could barely hear him over the sounds of skin slapping against skin and his own moans and curses as he got closer to climax. If he had been more conscious of his thoughts, he might have been a little surprised at just how turned on he was by the roughness, the way Lafayette was taking from him, fucking into him without regard to his comfort. Instead his thoughts were clouded by how damn good it all felt. 

“Your ass feels perfect, mon cher.” Alex noted how steady his voice sounded for someone driving into him that hard. “You’re so tight. So beautiful, all tied up and desperate.” He felt him change his angle a bit, and the next hit was even more direct than the last. He could feel his body tightening, heating up, building towards release. 

“God, your dick feels so good. Fuck, I’m gonna come, I’m almost there.”

“That’s right, come for me mon chou, come on my dick like the little slut you are.” That did it for him, within seconds his orgasm overtook him, cum shooting onto the sheets below them. He was briefly aware of Lafayette behind him, digging himself in deep. Felt the cum pulsing into him. Then Laf’s body relaxed, and he slowly pulled out, giving Alex’s ass a loving squeeze before moving to uncuff him. The leather fell off his wrists, and the air felt cool against the newly exposed skin. He felt the urge to fall against the bed below him, but suddenly remembered the mess he had made there. Reluctantly, he kneeled up instead, folding his legs into a more comfortable sitting position at the edge of the bed. He noted the irony that he was the one breathing heavily at this point, while Lafayette, who had been doing most of the work, was standing next to him as if he hadn’t just tried to fuck his brains out. He moved to sit down next to Alex, his legs hanging off the bed. He pressed a quick kiss to the side of his head, one hand resting against his thigh. “Was that okay?” He could hear a nervous tinge in his voice, almost sounded guilty. 

“Yeah,” he nodded quickly. “It was great. I just didn’t know you… had that in you? Where’d you learn to be so, well, whatever that was?” He was slightly frustrated by his inability to form the right words. Chalked it up to post-sex exhaustion. 

“Intuition?” he offered with a small smile. “I was just worried, at the end, that I was going too far?” 

Alex laughed at that, giving him a reassuring grin. “You mean the name calling? Fuck no, please don’t hesitate to do it more often. Trust me, I’ve said far worse during sex than that.”

Laf raised his eyebrows at the declaration, but didn’t comment. Instead he just wound an arm around Alex’s waist, pulling him closer. Alex leaned into him for a moment, breathing in his scent, and then with a kiss to his chest sat back up. He stood up, legs still shaky from the amount of time he was cuffed and ass a little sore. “Want to take care of the sheets? Because I know I’m not sleeping on top of my own jizz.” 

Lafayette breathed out a little laugh. “Yes, but we need to put on some clothes first.” He picked up a soft t-shirt, tossing it at Alex. 

He pulled it on, reaching for a pair of boxer briefs from his bag. As he finished getting dressed, Laf came up from behind, wrapping his arms around his waist and resting his head against Alex’s shoulder. “Happy birthday, mon amor,” he said softly, giving him a final kiss on the cheek before pulling away to deal with the sheet situation.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pure porn. No regrets. 
> 
> Come talk to me on tumblr: ilovefoodandgirls


	16. Chapter 16

Their second semester passed quickly. Alex kept busy with schoolwork, RA duties, and acquiring a summer internship. He had a hard enough time making room in his schedule for his boyfriend, never mind anyone else. Their relationship continued to settle into something familiar and comforting, like a favorite book or a childhood home. A place where he could be unapologetically himself and know he wouldn’t be judged for it. Lafayette spent time with him almost every day, even if that meant sitting in his room quietly while he worked on a proposal for SGA or read through his notes for class. He appreciated the company. Having someone there he could bounce ideas off of or complain about professors with. And the things they would get up to after all the work was done for the night? Well that was just a bonus. 

April arrived faster than Alex realized, and with it came the usual rush surrounding final exams. The air was getting warmer, but most students were holed up inside their dorms, frantically working to meet deadlines. The atmosphere in the lecture halls seemed heavier, more focused, with everyone trying to catch up on things they missed while still soaking in the new material, ears always waiting to hear the words “this will be on the exam”. Realistically, Alex knew he was better prepared than most of his classmates. The drive he had when it came to his work was not a commonly found trait among college students. Yet he still doubled his efforts, spending hours perfecting papers and pouring over material. He didn’t have the luxury of family connections when he graduated. He needed to prove himself. 

Lafayette was almost irritatingly calm about his own exams. He took the attitude that as long as he had paid attention during classes, there was no need to put in any extra effort for finals. Alex spent a few days pestering him about it before giving up. During a particularly nice afternoon at the end of the month, Laf was laying on Alex’s bed while he worked, watching some show on his laptop. After a few episodes he paused, pulling out his earbuds. 

“Alex.” No answer. 

“Alex!” he tried again. 

When it was clear he wouldn’t be responding, Lafayette walked over to him, leaning against the desk. After he typed out a few more sentences he finally looked up from his own laptop. “It’s nice outside. Let’s go do something.” 

Alex looked up at him, annoyed at the interruption, but so tempted to take a break with his boyfriend anyway. He considered the warm weather, the idea of getting out of his dorm for a little while, relaxing with his favorite person. But the gnawing drive for success, to prove everyone wrong, fought back, guilt pooling in his stomach. He had too much work to do. He didn’t have time for a break.

“I can’t,” he finally said, voice quiet, trying to keep his expression from looking too pained as he said it. “You know I can’t. I have a million things to do before the semester ends. I can’t let my GPA drop if I want to get into a good grad school. Then there’s still end of year stuff for SGA that needs to be done, and I still haven’t landed an internship, and I’m really running out of time for that.” He took a deep breath in, letting it all out in a loud sigh as he covered his face with one hand. “I just can’t afford to waste any time right now.” He lifted his head back up to look at Lafayette, hoping his unspoken apology was evident. 

He could read the disappointment on Laf’s face, but he only shrugged. “I know you have a lot going on. You should make a little time to relax though. You’re going to burn yourself out at this rate.”

“Got it. I’ll take some time after finals are over.”

“I meant before that. You cannot spend every hour until the end of year working. It’s not good for you.”

“Look, I know. Okay? I know it’s not healthy. I know I need more sleep and time off. I’m not stupid. It’s just- I need to do this. I’ve never had the luxury of not working hard. And if I screw it all up, when I’m so close to becoming something better than I was born into, better than I was expected to be? I couldn’t forgive myself for that.”

Lafayette didn’t move, still leaning against the desk. When Alex looked up he expected to see pity, but didn’t find it. Instead his brow was furrowed as if working through his own thoughts. He licked his lips before speaking. “Okay.” His voice was soft, gentle. “I can’t pretend to know how that feels, but if this is what you need then that’s okay. If you need anything from me though, please let me know. I don’t want you completely exhausting yourself.” 

Alex turned back towards his work, nodding his head. He didn’t want to look Laf in the eyes. He couldn’t. It was hard enough to put himself out there like that, and he wanted the conversation to be over. 

“I’m going to go out okay? Find something to do outside.”

“Okay,” he replied, not looking up from his desk. Lafayette stood still for a moment, hesitating, then grabbed his things and started putting them back in his bag. Alex could hear the noise of the zipper, and then his footsteps to the door. 

“I love you.” He was quieter than normal, more cautious, and Alex felt his heart warm and the guilt intensify. 

“I love you too,” he supplied, looking over his shoulder for a brief moment. He tried to make the words sound as genuine as they felt in his heart, giving a small smile that he hoped was reassuring. As he turned back to the article he was reading he heard the click of the door closing behind him. He sensed more emotions trying to bubble up to the surface, but he blocked them out. “Later,” he told himself quietly. He didn't have the time or energy to deal with unpacking his feelings. 

 

Over the weekend they finally had a little free time before exams started, the calm before the storm. Lafayette had insisted on taking Alex out for brunch, telling him that coffee and reheated pizza was not an appropriate diet. Alex begrudgingly agreed, and they ended up at a small café with plates full of breakfast food in front of them. After they had both taken a few bites, Alex continued the conversation they had been having before the food arrived. “By the way, I finally heard back, and I got one of the internships I applied for. Paid position too.”

“That’s wonderful, mon chou! I knew you’d get something. They’d be crazy not to hire someone as hardworking as you.”

“Thanks,” Alex said with a small smile. “It’s mostly bitch work. You know, getting coffee orders, filing shit, sending out emails. It’ll look good on my resume though. And the getting paid part is nice.”

“I’m sure you’ll impress them all no matter what they have you doing. Maybe once they see how talented you are they’ll give you more important things to do as well.” He paused, taking another bite of his pancakes. “Where are you staying during the summer then? Did you find an apartment?”

Alex shrugged. “I was probably just going to stay at Herc’s place again. His couch is pretty comfortable, and it’s a lot easier than trying to find a studio in the city or looking for a roommate or something.”

“If you don’t already have something lined up…” Lafayette trailed off, looking hesitant. 

“What?” Alex asked, eyeing him suspiciously. 

“I am planning on staying in New York for the summer. I already have it arranged. I signed a lease on an apartment a while ago. I just didn’t know if, well if it would make you uncomfortable, to spend the summer there with me. I figure we basically live together now anyway?”

Alex was momentarily speechless. This was the first he was hearing of Laf’s summer plans. “Um, yeah.” He cleared his throat, willing himself to speak. “I mean, that would be good. What’s the rent like?”

“Don’t worry about the rent. I can cover it.” 

Alex pursed his lips, feeling the urge to prove he wasn’t a charity case. “Look, I’m getting paid over the summer, and I do have money saved up, I can help out with rent.” He tried to keep his voice from sounding too bitter. 

“It’s not that I think you can’t help.” Lafayette was speaking slowly, choosing his words carefully. “It’s just that I already picked out the apartment, and I chose it based on my budget. I don’t think you’re incapable of providing for yourself, Alex. Anyone who has met you can see how independent you are, how successful you are in everything you do.”

Alex was staring down at his plate, hands gripping his thighs under the table. “I don’t want everyone to think I’m just some pathetic kid who can’t take care of himself.”

“I know,” Lafayette said quietly, his heart breaking a little at the look on Alex’s face. “No one thinks that though. I promise you this. It’s no different than staying at Hercules’ apartment for the summer. Except that with me you get to sleep in a bed.”

“Look you don’t have to charge me half of your rent or whatever, but can you at least let me pay some of it? I’d feel less… weird about it that way.”

“Whatever you want to do. I just want to spend the summer with you, mon chou.”

Alex finally looked up to see Lafayette waiting for his response. “Okay,” he said quietly. “We can go over details later. How big is this place exactly?”

“It is a… decent size.” 

Alex bit down on the inside of his lip, swallowed down his response before it could leave his mouth, and continued eating his brunch.


	17. Chapter 17

Two weeks later, and the whole school was buzzing with excitement. People finishing their last finals, parents helping kids pack up their cars, everyone scrambling to get out of the city. It was as if the entire student body had taken a collective sigh of relief. Unfortunately for Alex, his last task as an RA was to assist with the moveout process. Students were preoccupied with saying goodbyes and making plans, while parents grew increasingly irritable as they transported boxes and furniture in the heat. Lafayette offered to help, and though Alex didn’t want to subject him to this special kind of torture, he couldn’t pass up more time with his boyfriend and more hands to move the students out as fast as possible. 

He saw Laf walking back towards him, a little sweaty after helping parents move mini fridges and boxes filled with clothes. He gave his boyfriend a small wave, grateful that he was in charge of collecting room keys and not loading up cars. “How’s it going?” he asked as Laf reached the table he was seated at and walked around to stand next to Alex.

“It’s going well.” He wiped his forehead with the back of his hand and leaned the other arm down to rest his body weight against the table. “Some of the parents are very demanding though.”

Alex laughed, patting him on the arm. “Trust me I know. I’ve been dealing with entitled parents all year. I had a kid earlier who lost his key, and when I told them he had to pay the fifty-dollar replacement fee I thought the dad was going to strangle me.” He rolled his eyes, sitting up a little straighter as he saw another family walking towards them. He moved his list of names in front of him again, giving the family a slightly forced smile. 

“You have your key?” The kid pulled it out of his pocket, placing it on the table in front of him. “Perfect. Your name?” He searched his list, finding the name and crossing him off. “Alright, you’re all set. Have a good summer!” As they walked away, Alex turned back to Laf, resting his hand on top of his. “So, everything ready at the apartment?” 

He gave a small shrug. “More or less. My stuff is all moved in at least, but we’ll still need to go shopping for some things. All of the furniture should be there though.”

“As long as you have the bed set up, we should be fine for tonight at least. Want to just go out for dinner? I’m not going to want to make anything by the time we’re finally finished here.”

“Very romantic way to propose a dinner date, Alexander.” 

Alex rolled his eyes again. “You want to go out for food or not?”

Lafayette sighed. “Yes. I would love to. We don’t have much food there anyway.”

“Alright, sounds good. There’s this Thai place I’ve been meaning to try. It’s not too far from here.” He gave Laf a quick smile before another family approached the table. 

“I’m going to continue helping with the move out now. I’ll be back in a little while, alright?”

“Okay,” Alex replied, giving him a little wave as he walked off towards the staircase. 

 

They arrived at the new apartment later that night, both filled with Thai food and feeling giddy with no classes or exams left to worry over. Alex let Lafayette lead him, not sure where exactly they were going. When he finally slowed, pointing out the building across the street from them, Alex stood in shock for a moment. The building was intimidatingly tall, rows upon rows of windows that seemed to stretch into the sky, the shiny exterior reflecting the moonlight. He followed his boyfriend inside, noting the revolving door and the front desk with some sort of stone countertop and immaculately dressed staff. Lafayette looked like he fit in here, with his expensive clothes and the confident way he strode through the lobby. 

Alex was used to feeling out of place. He had felt that disconnect all his life, moving to the continental US, living with his foster families, going to school at Columbia. He never felt like he quite belonged anywhere he went. He had learned over time to use it to his advantage, to prove to everyone that he did belong, that he was worthy of his own success. It gave him a drive, and an understanding of places and people that others might not have. It allowed him to get over feelings of discomfort and take risks. Despite all of that, this place made him feel as if he were a child who had stumbled into some place he didn’t belong. He folded his arms across his chest, feeling like everybody was watching him, wondering why he was there. 

He scooched closer to Laf as they waited for the elevator, suddenly feeling extremely self-conscious. The doors finally opened and they got inside, Lafayette pushing a button for some very high numbered floor. As he turned back to Alex, he noticed how stiff he looked. “My love, are you alright?”

“I’m fine,” he brushed off the concern. “Just tired.”

“Okay, if you say so.”

Annoyance sparked inside of him, but he bit it back. Lafayette didn’t deserve his irritation. The rest of the elevator ride passed in strained silence, and they were both grateful when the elevator dinged and the doors slid open. Lafayette approached one of the doors in the hallway, key in hand, and let them inside. 

“Holy shit.” It was all Alex could think to say as he took in his surroundings. An open living space with floor to ceiling windows, a large kitchen with granite countertops and plenty of space for food preparation, a separate dining area. He glanced to his right where a hallway lead to more rooms, presumably the bathroom and bedrooms. The apartment was bigger than any in Manhattan had the right to be. He walked forward into the kitchen leaning against the countertop, the stone cool underneath his hand. Lafayette had already bought furniture, hiring a moving company to bring it all up for him. The color scheme was stunning, crisp white and black with the occasional pop of vibrant color. He took a deep breath, looking up at his boyfriend. “You didn’t tell me we were living in some gigantic, millionaires-only building.”

Lafayette licked his lips nervously, fidgeting with his hands. “I told you it was big.”

“Those were not the words you used.” Rationally he knew this was a ridiculous thing to be upset about, but he couldn’t help the frustration buzzing through his body. “I couldn’t afford a month’s rent on this place with all of my paychecks from this summer.”

“After a year living in the dorms I just wanted someplace a little nicer. With more space.” Laf looked sheepish, no longer meeting Alex’s eyes.

“Oh my god, how did you even survive a year in the dorms? I’m surprised you didn’t have them knock down a wall to make a bigger room for you, or call some people to get out of the whole ‘you have to live in the dorms freshman year’ rule.”

“Now you’re just being mean,” he said icily, glaring at him. “Look, I was fine living in the dorms. I enjoyed it, actually, since it is where I met you.” Alex’s face softened at that, and he looked like he was about to say something, but Laf continued before he had the chance. “But I can’t stand when you get like this. Is me having money this much of a problem to you? I can’t help that I have it. If you’re going to be so bitter every time I spend money on something, anytime my wealth is brought up at all, then maybe we need to rethink things.”

The silence that followed was so thick it seemed to freeze them both in place. Lafayette hadn’t yelled, hadn’t even raised his voice, but the threat in his words was enough to cool Alex down. To knock some sense into him. They stood silently staring at each other. Neither wanted to speak first. Neither knew what to say. It’s hard to say if it was only seconds, minutes, or even longer, but finally Alex broke eye contact, staring at the floor as he opened his mouth. 

“I don’t want that.” His voice was quiet, barely above a whisper, but Lafayette heard. He tilted his head to the side, silently instructing him to go on. “I’m sorry. I don’t want to jeopardize any of this, our relationship, it’s just hard for me to deal with stuff like this.”

“That does not give you right to act like that. Be mean and hurtful to me.”

“I know.” His voice was even softer now, traces of shame coloring his words. “It’s my own problem, and I have no right dragging you into it. I need to deal with it on my own.”

“No.” Alex snapped his head up at that. It was not the response he was expecting. “You don’t have to deal with things on your own. I would not expect that of you. You just cannot use it as excuse to lash out towards me. I want to help you, Alex, but I need you to let me. You cannot treat me as if I am your enemy.”

Alex nodded slowly, processing the information. “Understood.”

Finally, Lafayette stepped forward, breaking down the invisible wall between them, and scooped Alex into a hug. He buried his face in Laf’s chest, all of the day’s exhaustion suddenly hitting him very hard. “I really am sorry,” he mumbled into the soft fabric of his boyfriend’s shirt. 

“I know you are, mon chou.” He stroked Alex’s hair gently. “Thank you for telling me, though.”

 

After their argument, life in their apartment settled into familiar routine. For the first week, the two of them had no commitments, so they spent a lot of time together. They visited the grocery store to stock up their fridge and cleaning supplies, cooked and ate meals together, and spent nights on the couch together. Alex thought back to the beginning of their relationship, how afraid he had been of settling into a domestic life with someone. His current situation had crept up on him, but he found that he didn’t mind it as much as he thought he would. He was perfectly content to spend his evenings stretched out on the couch next to his boyfriend reading a book, feeling less alone than he had in a long time. 

His internship started the second week of summer break. Before leaving the apartment, he inspected himself in the mirror. Khaki pants, a button down shirt, hair pulled back. He blinked a few times, staring at his reflection. He looked more well rested than he had all semester, so he supposed that was a good thing. As he stepped out of the bathroom, he was greeted by a sleepy looking Lafayette, still in his pajama bottoms. 

He hummed his appreciation, taking in Alex’s attire. “You look very nice, very professional, mon cher. Did you eat anything yet?”

Alex shrugged. “I don’t have a lot of time, and I want to be early. I have to get going in a few minutes.”

Laf sighed, heading towards the kitchen, Alex following behind him. “You can’t go off to work without eating anything. You want to make a good first impression, yes?” 

Alex mumbled his agreement. 

“Then you have to eat. You won’t be performing your best if you are hungry. Here.” He popped a couple slices of bread into the toaster. “It will be done in a couple of minutes and you can bring it with you and eat it on the way.”

Alex gave him a halfhearted eyeroll, but smiled all the same. He leaned back against the counter, stretching with a loud yawn and picking up his mug of coffee from earlier, downing the rest of its contents. As he waited on the toaster, he moved to the coffee pot, emptying the rest of it into a travel mug. 

“So,” Lafayette said, putting the toast onto a plate as it popped out and spreading it with jam. “Are you excited for your first day?”

“I guess.” He honestly wasn't sure how he was feeling about it. Nervous, excited, scared, eager? 

Laf smiled, handing him the toast on a napkin. “I know you’re going to do great.”

“Thanks.” Alex grabbed the toast and his coffee before accepting a kiss goodbye at the door. He took a steadying breath as the elevator door opened, took a bite of the toast, and braced himself for whatever the day had in store for him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Come hang out with me on tumblr @ilovefoodandgirls


	18. Chapter 18

The next two years at Columbia flew by. Busy schedules were made even busier with dates and jobs, parties and extracurriculars. Soon enough, it was spring of Alex’s senior year. He was set to graduate suma cum laude, only a few exams separating him from graduation and all the opportunities and struggles that came with life after undergrad. He had heard back from NYU and accepted an offer to attend their journalism program for his master’s degree. 

He was in that strange place in life where one chapter was already over, but the next had yet to begin. His future was stretched out before him like a vast ocean, too expansive and turbulent to give him any idea what might lie below the surface. The excitement and tension were enough to put him on edge. He wanted to jump into the world, to start working on things that mattered. He felt like he was ready, like he had been ready for years, and it frustrated him to no end that he had to sit through four more years of schooling before he could start doing things that mattered. 

There was one more thing bothering him. As excited as he was to graduate and move on, he knew going to a different school and having a different schedule would mean even less time with his boyfriend. Even after several wonderful years together, he worried that such a big change in his life might further complicate their already complicated relationship. He spent a lot of time alone in his room, studying and writing, hoping to occupy his mind with enough work that he wouldn’t have any time to worry. 

 

With his final exams and projects finally finished, Alex was spending a night out with some friends, getting drinks and reminiscing on his years at Colombia. The bar was dark, a buzz of chatter surrounding them as they carried their drinks over to a booth in the corner. Alex squeezed in after Hercules, Angelica sitting down on his other side. He breathed out a deep sigh, grateful for the end of exams and a night of fun. Angelica raised her glass in the air, loudly proclaiming, “To the graduates!” Everyone else at the table raised their glasses to join her. “Eliza, Alex, congratulations on four years of hard work. Eliza, I know you’re going to go out there and kill it, succeeding at everything as you always do. Alex, you’re gonna do great too. As long as you can learn to keep your mouth shut when you need to.”

Hercules cleared his throat, “Alex, I can’t believe it’s been four years already! It seems like just yesterday you were this tiny little kid, completely helpless in NYC. You’re still tiny, but I think you’ve learned how to mostly take care of yourself. I’m so glad I met you when you first moved to the city, and as much as I joke around, you’re one of the smartest people I know. I’m proud to have helped you out on your way to success. Eliza, you’re incredibly smart too, and with all of your talents and your wonderful heart, you’re going to do amazing things out there. Congrats guys! You fucking made it!”

They all clinked glasses in the middle of the table, followed by a generous sip of their drinks. They spent the rest of the night retelling their favorite stories from school and talking about future plans. The time passed quickly, and the drunker they all got, the more they wanted to stay and celebrate forever. At five drinks in, Alex found himself thinking that this, enjoying a night just being with friends, was the best thing about life. Of course, his sober self would never agree with that, but for now he was happy and content, and that was what mattered tonight. 

He got home late, around two in the morning. When he walked into the apartment after a brief struggle with his keys, Lafayette was waiting in the living room for him. Alex stumbled into his arms, giving him a sloppy kiss before being escorted to the couch. “Laf! I missed you tonight, babe. How was your date?”

Lafayette chuckled at his slightly slurred speech, but put an arm around him and kissed him on top of the head. “It was alright. Probably not going out again, but it wasn’t bad. However, it seems like you had a very fun night, my little lion.”

He nodded his head in agreement, the motion making the room spin a bit. “Mhmm I had a great time. You should come next time. It’d be so great, all of us together. It’d be a perfect night, with my perfect people.”

“I will, I promise. Now, I think it’d be a good idea to get some sleep. You probably need some water, yes?”

“Yeah, I’m a little bit thirsty.”

“Head to the bed, mon amor, I’ll bring you a glass of water.”

When Lafayette entered the bedroom, he found Alex sprawled out on the bed fully dressed with his face in the pillows. He walked over carefully, putting the glass on the bedside table with as little noise as he could. Feeling very tired himself, he turned out the light and settled under the covers. Just when he felt himself starting to drift off, he heard Alex whisper his name.

“What is it, mon chou?”

“Don’t want you to leave.”

He scrunched his face in confusion, turning to look at Alex in the dark. “I am not going anywhere. It’s late, I am staying in bed with you for sleep.”

“People always leave. Eventually.”

Laf propped himself up on his elbow, starting to wake up again. “What’s going on? Why are talking like this?”

“It’s just… people always leave. They just- they do. And I’m graduating from Colombia and you’re not yet. And I’m just worried you’re not gonna- you’re not gonna want to- that you’ll leave. Because we’re not gonna be doing the same stuff or goin’ to the same place every day. And if you’re gonna leave I just wanna know when so I’m not just waiting for it to happen.” He rushed through the last several words, tripping over a few of them as he went. 

Lafayette could feel a real physical pain in his chest as he listened, and he did his best to keep his voice steady as he pulled Alex into his arms. “Alexander Hamilton, listen to me. Every day since I’ve met you, you warmed my heart, challenged me, proven just how smart and talented you are, and helped me become a better person. I feel like the time before we met, I was just wandering around looking for you. Now that I’ve found you, there’s no possible way I am letting you go. You don’t have to worry about me leaving, I’m staying right here by your side for as long as you’ll let me. I love you so much, and I want to be here to witness all of the incredible things you will be accomplishing. No matter what happens, I’ll be here. Do you understand me?”

Alex nodded, resting his head on Laf’s chest and taking a long, deep breath. He closed his eyes, letting his boyfriend’s words repeat themselves over and over in his mind like a comforting song until he finally drifted off to sleep. 

 

When he woke up in the morning, Alex felt a persistent throbbing in the back of his head. He shifted to his side, attempted to open his eyes, and squeezed them shut tight again as the light from the room assaulted him. He heard a small sigh from above him, and suddenly there was a warm hand in his hair, rubbing soothing circles on his scalp. He tried opening his eyes again, this time blinking them slowly while adjusting to the daylight. Lafayette was sitting up next to him, one hand in his hair and the other holding open the pages of a book. The light was too much. He rolled over with a groan, pressing his face into Laf’s thigh and blocking out the sun once again. 

“Alexander.” He felt the hand move to his shoulder, gently rolling him onto his back. “You need to wake up. You have to get ready for the ceremony.” 

He kept his eyes stubbornly closed. “The whole school ceremony is dumb anyway. I can skip it.”

“Take some aspirin.” Alex felt two small pills being pressed into his hand. “You’ll regret it if you miss the ceremony. You have worked very hard for this. Eliza will be disappointed if you’re not there as well.”

“Fine,” he grumbled. “Just please, stop talking for a few minutes.” He swore he heard Lafayette breathe out a small sigh of laughter. He chose to ignore it, focusing on adjusting his eyes to the bedroom. He noted that the curtains were drawn, and decided that the sun had to be five times brighter than usual because there was no way this blinding level of sunlight was normal. Once he was able to sit up, he held out his hand expectantly. Lafayette pushed a glass towards him, and he swallowed the aspirin followed by the whole glass of water. 

The morning went by quickly, and before he knew it he was heading out the door with the slightly too big gown he had bought second hand from another student draped over his frame and his cap tucked under his arm. Lafayette had insisted on blow drying his hair and making sure that it looked nice for the pictures he planned on taking later. Alex begrudgingly let him, muttering under his breath that it didn’t matter since it would be covered by the cap anyway. As they walked down the street, Lafayette took his hand, giving it a gentle, reassuring squeeze. Alex responded with a smile, gripping his boyfriend’s hand tightly and bracing himself for the long day ahead.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm... alive...? 
> 
> Sorry I feel awful that this has taken so long. Sometimes life gets in the way of things. 
> 
> Anyway, I'm trying to wrap this story up in a couple of chapters because it's taking me way too long to finish it. 
> 
> Hope you all enjoy the ending! 
> 
> Find me on tumblr @ilovefoodandgirls


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